The Dating Game: Why Women Should Make the First Move

Just because men traditionally make the first move when it comes to dating doesn't mean that women can't! Here's why you should take charge when playing the dating game.
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Quiz: What's Your Movie Character Flirting Style?

Traditionally, it’s expected that the guy make the first move in a dating relationship. However, none of our other dating tactics are traditional – people meet online, things like gender or race don’t decide whom you love (nor do your parents), and age gaps are no longer taboo. So why would this one trait continue to be considered ‘the way things should be?’

This isn’t to say that you can’t let him make the first move, but more to consider doing it yourself. There are many perks to making the first move; these are just a few:

1. Confidence Is King

Women approaching men is ‘High Value’, which is as key in initial interactions as it is in a relationship. Rather than “tricking” him into to kissing you by lingering or sheepishly trying to angle yourself the right way to look irresistible, take matters into your own hands and show him that you are interested. If you’re planning on making the first move, make sure your body language matches that throughout your date so you aren’t sending mixed signals. Imagine two women: one twirling her hair with arms crossed, looking down, and the other smiling eyes looking directly at you, grinning and engaged in the moment. Which is more appealing? If you put them out there, he’ll pick up your vibes, because men love women who know what they want. It’s completely sexy! Give him a cheeky look and go in for the kill. What guy is going to say no to that?

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2. The Power of Making Your Own Decision

When you give yourself the option of making the first move, you are more focused on what you want, not just on what he wants. Women tend to obsess over their ‘first impression’ on a date, and they tend to dismiss their own needs in this potential relationship. Was he interesting? Would he make a good partner? That’s why you’re on the date in the first place! If you’re open to making the first move, you can pay more attention to these things and determine that this is someone you’d like to move forward with. How many times have you kissed a guy just because he leaned in? This time you are not a backseat driver – it is just as much your decision as his. If you’ve enjoyed yourself and would like to take it to the next level, go for it. You’re making the opportunity rather than waiting around for it, which is completely empowering. And empowerment boosts your confidence, which we’ve already determined is extremely sexy!

Up next: Three more reasons to take charge of the dating game!

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