Jon Gosselin, Master Hacker? Or, Why Kate Is Suing Jon (And Why It’s Kind of Ridiculous)

And the saga continues: Kate Gosselin is suing her ex-husband, Jon, claiming that he hacked into her email and bank accounts for dirt for his tell-all book. Yikes!

Jon and Kate Gosselin 2013

In the great battle for the title of Worst Celebrity Couple EVER, Jon and Kate Gosselin may well be winning. It’s one thing to have a messy divorce—it’s unfortunate, but it happens—but to have a messy divorce which you continuously try to capitalize off of? That’s just low. But hey, guess what? Kate is suing Jon! Par-tay!

Here’s the deal: Last year, Jon’s business partner, tabloid writer Robert Hoffman, penned a book titled Kate Gosselin: How She Fooled the World—which was pulled from the market after only two days due to Kate’s allegations that the information contained within the book was obtained illegally. TMZ (of course) broke the story first; they told it in their typical salacious fashion, but the gist of it is this: According to Kate, Jon hacked into her email accounts, bank and phone records, and other private information and fed everything to Hoffman—even going so far as to steal the hard drive right out of her computer. I have a hard time believing that Kate wouldn’t notice her computer’s primary hard drive had gone missing, given that the machine kind of, um, wouldn’t actually work without it in there; I’m going to assume, therefore, that if Jon nabbed anything, it was an external hard drive: Small, portable, and easily swiped off of a table or out of a drawer. Jon Gosselin may be many things, but I doubt that a master thief is one of them.

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The Hollywood Reporter goes into a little more detail; according to them, the lawsuit accuses Jon of identity theft, wiretapping, and invasion of privacy and seeks unspecified damages. They’ve heard nothing from Jon’s or Hoffman’s camp yet, but they did get in touch with Kate’s lawyer, A Jordan Rushie. Said Rushie, “Jon violated a federal anti-hacking statute in order to publish salacious, scandalous, and defamatory information about Kate. It damaged her reputation.” Insofar as she still had a reputation left to damage, that is, because as far as I can see, she’s done an excellent job doing that herself over the years.

They both have, really. At this point, I have long stopped taking either one of their sides when they pull stunts like this because I find both of them so repugnant. What I find most remarkable is that they were able to keep up their squeaky clean appearance for so long. Given the explosion of disasters—all of which are of their own making—that has surrounded them since their divorce in 2009, I can only assume that they’ve always had the capacity to behave badly and simply got reeeeeeeeally good at hiding it. Kate Gosselin: How She Fooled the World? How about just The Gosselins: How They Fooled the World, instead? WAY more accurate.

You know how last week I said I wanted to see Lady Gaga and Perez Hilton settle their feud Celebrity Death Match-style? Same goes for Jon and Kate. Because seriously, guys—this has GOT to stop. You’re fully-functioning (well, mostly) adults. Stop behaving like children. If it takes a transformation into Claymation characters to do it, so be it!

Tell us: Who would win this Celebrity Death Match, Jon or Kate?

Lucia Peters is BettyConfidential’s senior editor.

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