Celebrity New Year’s Resolutions
Wear bras, quit blabbing and more shower scenes!
Cameron Diaz wants to start wearing a bra. Tori Spelling wants to improve her posture. Chris Cornell wants to continue travelling and present his music to a global audience (is someone itching to be the new Bono?).
All of those are, of course, VERY noble goals (especially Cam – seriously, the braless days are long gone, hon). But here at Betty, we thought a few other of our celebrity friends could use some help deciding on a resolution for the upcoming year.
BritBrit – Resolve to stay the heck on track and get your babies back! A lot of us out here are rooting for you! -Joseph
Hugh Jackman – Resolve to never again appear in a film without a shower scene. Once you go Australia, you can’t go back. -April
Lindsay Lohan’s Dad – Resolve to never speak to the press or in public about your daughter again. Ever. -April
Katie Holmes – Resolve to send Suri’s hand me downs to my soon-to-be born daughter! Seriously? What does she do with them after she wears them all of one time probably? -Julie
Anderson Cooper – Resolve to come out of the closet already! We promise we ladies won’t love you any less! -Judy
Vince Vaughn – Resolve to finally get the nerve to ask Manic Mommy out, even though she’s married. -ManicMommy Stephanie Elliot
Jennifer Aniston – Resolve to stop doing the on-and-off thing with John Mayer — The man originally ended things because he just “wanted to be alone”? He also acts like a super sensitive boy but in reality he’s incredibly superficial. -Carolyn
Paris Hilton – Resolve to make good on your promise to do charity work in Africa, and whatever else you babbled on about after you were sprung from the can. -April
Tom Cruise – Let my Katie goooooooooooooooooooo! (sung to the tune of “Go Down Moses,” of course). Seriously, no one believes you love her, and this new talk of seven more children is downright frightening! -Megan
What celebs do YOU think need to make resolutions this year?