Dodging Dating Pit-Falls

Tips on how to avoid dating pitfalls.

The Single Life

How to Avoid the No-Brainers

The right fantasy can help you avoid an ugly reality

-Shoegirl

male musicianIf you read my piece on Hiding from the Exes, you may recall that I was about as mature as a 12-year-old when it came to ending relationships. Feigning illness, moving to Angola, and performing Houdini disappearing acts were not beneath me. Now, with (slightly) more maturity on my side I decided that I would behave much better in relationships-from start to finish. I decided to put some rules in place to mitigate my usual pitfalls.

Rule #1: Do not get involved unless there is clear cut potential. (No more aspiring Italian movie stars). Navigating my 19 fantasy crushes became much easier with Rule #1. Most of the men I safely had teenage crushes on were no more fit for a relationship than a pet hamster. I can now easily make crushes go away by having my men star in imaginary scenarios:

Having dinner with my business associates. This safely nixes the screen-print t-shirt wearing bohemian artists. While they may be engaging at a CD-release party, business dinners are another story. You cannot invite someone who thinks the stock market is where you buy prosciutto to hang out with your work colleagues.

Meeting my Grandmother. This safely ensures I don’t fall for the successful playboys that seem to dominate the city. This isn’t because my Granny is a sweet little old biddy – she’d insist they shoot whiskey and play cards with her – but she can sure see through any poker face. And a man that can rival my Granny’s hand is a keeper.

Participating in a morning run. Now they don’t have to qualify for the Boston marathon, but if they wheeze and fall over after half a mile? Well . . . what would that say for their cardiovascular ability for “other” types of marathons? Strength outdoors means strength indoors.


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