The Week’s Worst Relationship Advice: October 27, 2008
Why should I listen to you?
Our first bit of bad advice isn’t so much bad as it is a very odd situation. A married, unemployed man writes in, worried that he’s getting carried away with an online relationship he started with a woman he’s never met. He’s told his fantasy woman that he’s a high-powered executive and his wife is starting to suspect he’s up to something.
Agony aunts Jann Blackstone-Ford and Sharyl Jupe advise him to put his online time to better use – perhaps by finding a job. I’ve got no problem with that advice, though they could’ve been a touch harsher. The odd part is that Blackstone-Ford is married to Jupe’s ex-husband. Huh. Who cares about the stupid computer dude – I want to hear more about their relationship!
Dear Sugar hears from a woman who’s been with her boyfriend for seven years. She’s been living with him for four of those years and they both have children from past marriages as well as two of their own. We’ve all heard this story before - she wants to get married, he refuses.
Her advice is that the wannabe-bride think about what she really wants (um, marriage) and weigh how important it is and how happy or unhappy she’ll be without it.
The thing is, this all should’ve been decided before they moved in together. It definitely should’ve been settled before they had kid #1, and without a doubt before kid #2. One of the most important lessons anybody can learn, is that when someone tells you who they are, believe them. Unless this woman feels like rounding up all her kids and moving elsewhere she’s stuck living by his rules.