ASK REAL GUYS
My boyfriend has been dodging...
Dear ASK REAL GUYS: My boyfriend has been dodging the opportunity to meet my parents. I know that's a major step for most guys, but I just happen to be very close with my family. I feel weird that they haven't met someone I enjoy dating. I'm not looking for any sign of a major commitment just yet, but any guy who wants to be considered has to know my family. How do I handle this?
Steven: The key question is have you shared everything you have said in this question with your boyfriend. My response would be, "Ask him!" You can't assume that he doesn't want to meet your parents, unless he has said so. Maybe he has been busy and hasn't found the time and doesn't realize that it is that important to you. Most people are not mind readers so we can't expect our spouses, significant others, relatives or friends to know what we are thinking. In order to not create a lot of imaginations in our minds we have to check in and ask questions. Once you know you can then approach the situation with clear facts.
I would recommend that when you make the request of your boyfriend to meet your family that you start out by telling him that it is really important to you that the people that you date know your family. You can also tell him that you are not looking for a major commitment. Then ask him if he would like to meet your family and schedule a time. If you find out that he doesn't want to meet your family than this might be an excellent opportunity to probe into how he feels about you and why. His response may reveal something about the relationship that you were unaware of and may help you move forward. You may not get the response you want but you will never know unless you ask.
Most problems in relationships occur when people involved do not share what they want. After all, if we don't take a stand for what we want, who will?
