4 Tips For Dating As a Single Mom
From the authors of “Love For Grown-ups: How to Marry for Life When You’ve Already Got a Life” — great advice for navigating the dating waters with your kids in the boat.
-The Garter Brides
When you’re a single mom your first priority is your child, as it very well should be. That does not however, mean that you can’t give yourself just as much attention. Often we put our own happiness on hold to give our kids the attention they need. So what happens when you’ve found the guy you want to keep seeing? How to do you balance the love for your children with the love for new spouse? Here are a few tips for dating as a single mom based on the book Love For Grown-ups: How to Marry for Life When You’ve Already Got a Life…
1. Be Honest
Always be upfront with the person you’re dating about your personal situation. Whether it’s three kids or two ex-husbands, make sure he knows what he’s getting into from the beginning. Don’t be afraid of how he might react — you’re a package deal and Ii he can’t accept you for everything that comes along with you, then he isn’t the one for you.
2. Don’t Jump The Gun
Just because the two of you click on the first date, don’t go straight into ‘what if he and my child don’t get along’ or ‘what if we get married’. Let things flow and give it time before you start making long-term plans.
3. Keep Your Kids ‘In The Loop’
Communicating with your kids is just as, if not more, important than communicating with your new mate. Listen to them on how they feel about your mate, and before you make any big decisions with him (moving in, getting married). This way they won’t feel blind-sided when these events come up. Giving them the time to process and understand the changes will make them feel more respected and understood as well.
When it comes to disciplining your child, your new mate should not be involved too soon. When you’ve decided to take things to the next level, be it getting married or moving in, speak to your mate and make sure there is an understanding as to how you and he will discipline your child. A conversation between the three of you will also maintain the peace when your child knows how and who will be disciplining them
The authors of Love for Grown-ups: How to Marry for Life When You’ve Already Got a Life, collectively known as The Garter Brides, wrote their book to inspire women of a certain age to look for love and advise them on the challenges that come along with marrying after 35. The book will be available July 26, in stores as well as e-books. Click here to pre-order it on Barnes & Noble. Please follow us on Twitter @thegarterbrides and connect on Facebook.