3. Cut the cutsie.
Yes, guys like sugar and spice and everything nice. Just don’t go too heavy on the sugar. Feminity is hot. But if a guy suspects you’ll one day turn his bachelor pad into a Hello Kitty museum, you’ll send him running right back to the sports bar. Are you too sweet?
— If your date closes his eyes, can he misidentify the smell of your perfume as a passing dessert cart?
— Are your accessories made of the same materials as Barbie’s?
— Could your “date voice” be confused with that of the lead character on an animated TV series?
If you answered “yes” to any of these questions, it’s time to dial down your girlie-ness, trade out those retro schoolgirl barrettes and show him you’re a grown woman inside and out. (Disregard this rule if your date shows up in a sweatshirt featuring a Disney logo.)
4. Blow his mind, not his checkbook.
Guys go on dates to smooch, not schmooze! Don’t grill him about 401k’s, vacation home zip codes or numbers of potential kids. Doing so will make him think the only thing in his pants that interests you is his wallet. Instead, show off your knowledge of current events, critique the latest novel you read (or wrote) and tantalize him with your command of the obscure. My current go-to is the history of American Sign Language. But if you’re the type who just can’t resist talking numbers be prepared to discuss your own stats too, including age, bust size and percentage chance of getting a second date.
5. The finish line.
Though they may not show it, even the cockiest guys are nervous at the end of a first date. It’s important to give the proper signals so your guy knows what to do. If the date isn’t going well, keep a “handshake” distance to ward off any awkward lean-ins. If the date is going well and you’re in the mood, linger for a moment for a brief kiss and then, before things get out of hand, tease him by whispering a flirty “goodnight.” Remember, just like their prehistoric ancestors, men are hunters at heart. Without the thrill of the chase and a few challenges along the way, a guy will quickly lose interest. Rabbits are a dime a dozen, but bringing down a sleek and sexy tiger takes time, cunning and is something they can brag to their friends about. Think tiger (but don’t get it confused with a cougar)!
Tell us: What’s the best advice your gay BFF has given you?
Brian Clark is an actor/writer living in Los Angeles. He cares about people. But to keep it fresh he has also rescued an insane pitbull mix named Bombay.