Just Another Manic Mommy
Eff Bomb on the Bus
Dear Manic Mommy: There’s a kid who has been saying bad words to my son on the bus, REALLY bad words. My son comes home from school and tells me that this boy is saying bad words to him, and he also asks if I would please tell his mother that her son is swearing. How should I handle it? I don’t know the mom very well and I don’t want to get into a confrontation.
Manic Mommy: Something like this recently occurred with Manic Mommy’s own children and I can tell you this kind of stuff REALLY angers the lioness in me! But going to the mother would do absolutely nothing. If the kid is a swearer, he’s probably a liar too. When this happened to my son Tukey, the kid whispered the bad phrase, so it was obvious he knew what he was doing was something he would get in trouble for doing.
I tell my children that if someone says something mean to them (whether it is a swear, or name calling or teasing), my kids should stand tall and look the bully in his eyes, and flat-out say, “Are you kidding ME? Do you know THAT is THE BADDEST WORD you could EVER SAY!?” or if they are being teased, my kids should look the teaser in the eye and say, “Are you kidding ME? THAT’S ALL YOU GOT? Can’t you do ANY better than THAT?”
If they challenge the bully, put him down a bit, make him feel as if he was stupid for being what he was (STUPID!) in the first place, maybe it’ll make the bully realize that what he’s doing is not a very nice or productive thing and he’ll put his efforts toward something a little bit nicer.
I hope so anyway. There are just too many mean kids on the bus these days. And I’m not in the mood to drive my kids to school, so they’re just going to have to deal with the meanies and learn to fight ‘em back the civilized way!