Down with Yummy Mummies!
The “post baby body” celebrity miracle mommies must be stopped.
-April Daniels Hussar
OK, that’s it – I can’t take it any more. They must be stopped! The celebrity yummy mummies of the world are really screwing things up for the rest of us.
The latest Yummy Mummy miracle – Heidi Klum (Yummy Mummy poster girl), who just delivered her FOURTH BABY three weeks ago, not only appeared in thigh highs (and dressed as a totally freaky crow but whatever) at her Halloween party the other night, but is scheduled to host the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show this month. Reports are conflicted as to whether she’ll actually “strut” the runway – but it seems either way she’ll be slightly more covered up than usual. Which I’m not taking to mean not much.
“The last time [I gave birth], I had two months [before I hit the runway], and I don’t know if I have that much time this time,” Heidi told E! last August. “It was pushing it the last time. But if I don’t make it, I’m sure I’ll be very sad.”
Isn’t that just the saddest thing you ever heard? (And wow – two whole months!)
When did this obsession with “post baby bodies” set in? It seems like every time I turn around there’s a new “POST BABY BODY” story in the news. Just in the last month alone, in addition to Heidi’s miraculous sexy crow outfit, we have: Ellen Pompeo Shows Her Post-Baby Belly; Sarah Michelle Gellar Shows Off Post-Baby Body; What Post-Baby Weight? Alessandra Ambrosio Looks Better than Ever; and Jennifer Hudson Premieres Post Baby Bod! … I could go on. But I won’t. For my own sake.