PhePhe on Astrology
Today’s Horoscope: Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Pisces February 19 – March 20
Wouldn’t it be nice if someone were standing by to advise you on your fledging relationship? Well there is Jerry Seinfeld, who will be returning to TV in The Marriage Ref, a reality show that will help couples handle disputes. View today as an opportunity to rise above the daily pettiness that surrounds you. Financial matters are improving.
Try: playing poker
Aries March 21 – April 19
This is a good time to examine your friendships. You may not wish to follow or even mimic their lives (think: All five Spice Girls having babies), but it would be nice to find out what’s going on. Expect to receive some type of communication from long-lost friends today. Don’t hesitate to respond; friendships should be lifelong endeavors.
Try: doing a crossword puzzle in pen
Taurus April 20 – May 20
Everyone has heard the story, but who would have thought that President Obama would be our modern-day Robin Hood? He’s currently proposing taxing the rich to help pay for the health care of the poor and jobless. Today, you can expect a situation to arise in which you have a chance to get your point across. Don’t hold back, as even though you may feel mentally restless, your point will be delivered succinctly.
Try: making a panino
Gemini May 21 – June 21
Is it any wonder that you are finding it harder and harder to get a good night’s sleep? With more than 5 million Americans receiving unemployment benefits, the numbers may get worse before they get better. Expect changes in your financial status today. These changes signal a shift in your attitude toward keeping up with the Joneses, which can only lead you down a financially treacherous path (think: The record number of foreclosures).
Try: drawing a self-portrait
Cancer June 22 – July 22
According to a recent poll, only 37 percent of women hold a favorable opinion of Rush Limbaugh, compared with 56 percent of men. Not that this matters to you, dear Cancer, but you should know that your day will also have similarities to Rush’s. There are people out there close to you who aren’t feeling you and your moodiness. You can either suck it up or figure out what you can do to change your effect on people. Today’s the day to reassess your priorities when it comes to making friendships and deciding what’s more important – being liked or being hated.
Try: learning three new words
Leo July 23 – August 22
There are jokes, and then there are jokes that are just plain insensitive. When the mayor of Los Alamitos sent an e-mail out depicting the White House lawn with watermelons growing on the lawn, many people across America cried foul. Today you must be careful when it comes to sending anything that can be construed as racially sensitive. Errors made in haste are possible today if you won’t slow down.
Try: teaching someone something
Virgo August 23 – September 22
Before you open your mouth and accuse someone of something, make certain that they are indeed responsible. The last thing you want to do is pull a McCain (think: Helicopters ordered during Bush’s term, which will now be assigned to President Obama) and place the blame on the wrong person. If you are worried about stepping on toes, then get your facts straight first.
Try: eating a few hot peppers
Libra September 23 – October 22
If you can’t decide whether these are the worst of times or the best of
times, then take a look at a new policy at American Express: They are
sending RSVP codes to select customers, offering them a $300 prepaid card. If you look at the fine print, you’ll notice that the deal comes with a lot of conditions. Your mission for today is to read the fine print on every offer you receive, and only then decide if you are still in the game.
Try: playing Scrabble
Scorpio October 23 – November 21
If your words don’t suffice today, you may resort to physical means to get your point across (think: Earl Simmons being accused of hitting a corrections officer with a loaded food tray). With your way with words, there should be no reason for you to ever resort to violence. This is a good time to put the anger away and try to make a new beginning. You know that you were raised better than that.
Try: swinging on a rope swing
Sagittarius November 22 – December 21
It feels as if everyone is against you, but the truth is you are against
yourself. Instead of wondering why the universe is sending you lemons, try making lemonade. There’s no excuse for doing anything foolish when you know the consequences (think: Gabe Pruitt being arrested on suspicion of DUI) of your actions. Today, watch your step: Someone has it out for you and will not rest until they get you in trouble.
Capricorn December 22 – January 19
Another contestant on American Idol is receiving 15 minutes of fame. Katrina Darrell, the bikini girl, has being receiving offers to appear in clubs – provided she shows up in her bikini. Instead of taking the easy way out, you may want to consider the ramifications of your route, Capricorn. Everything you do today will be a part of your future. It would be wise to come up with a fresh plan that could prove useful to you in the future.
Try: working on anagrams
Aquarius January 20 – February 18
Just when you thought the big boys had learned their lessons, you hear about Northern Trust Bank paying millions of dollars to sponsor a PGA event – and this is after it received bailout money. Today, put your energy into workplace relations. This is the time to make your life more stable and secure rather than showing off what you have. Today, ask yourself whether you are self-possessed or if you are possessed by materialism.
Try: hiding a $20 bill somewhere in the house