Lifestyles of the Nearly-Divorced and Famous

Should Kelly Rutherford be allowed to continue filming 'Gossip Girl'?

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Lifestyles of the Almost-Divorced and Famous

Irreconcilable differences: Career or kids for Gossip Girl?

-Mary Beth Sammons

Kelly Rutherford and husbandYou’ve come a long way baby … Not! At least that’s the message ringing loud and clear from the D-R-A-M-A-filled real-life version of the LeDivorce-esque custody battle between pregnant Gossip Girl Kelly Rutherford and soon-to-be-ex-hubby Daniel Giersch.

Friday, a Los Angeles judge pooh-poohed daddy dearest’s claims that four-months-pregnant mom should turn real-life Donna Reed, bag her career and stay planted at home raising Hermes 2, and soon-to-be little sis in the crib of stability that’s LA, versus a NYC apartment filming Gossip Girl. However, the mudslinging is certain to continue in the months leading to the final custody hearing in April.

According to trusted sources such as Perez Hilton, the divorce has gone War of the Roses, big time, over the issue of Rutherford and the long hours required for filming Gossip Girl.

Giersch, it seems, claims in court papers that Rutherford’s Gossip Girl job makes life unsuitable for their children. But despite hubby’s temper tantrums, Friday’s ruling apparently stuffed a sock in the German entrepreneur/caveman Giersch’s mouth – he’s now promising a cease-fire and saying he vows to stay on good terms.

Yeah, right, until the custody schedule goes into place Day One Monday, when Rutherford starts filming again and Junior plays The Nanny Diaries in a Manhattan hotel room. Let’s just say that Giersch’s statement outside the courtroom doesn’t exactly come off as conciliatory: “I’m disappointed by today’s decision because it exposes our son for the next three months to a constantly crazy lifestyle. But we have to live with that decision and make the best out of it.”

Turns out he’s planning on trekking to the Big Apple to “watch” Hermes when mom is working. It’s certainly an interesting and not exactly novel concept injected into a divorce (and flung at women in general) – will a mom’s working interfere with parenting? Where have we heard that before? Like, in the dilemma of every working mom? Like, a whole magazine Working Mother is dedicated to helping moms balance work and raising kids. Like, has he heard about stay-at-home dads? Or divorced dads who have to deal with the fact that they can’t tell their exes how to run their lives anymore. Hmmm … could that perhaps be one of the reasons for the split?

Sure, it’s tough for any parent to juggle the demands of work and raising kids. Would that we all could find the perfect mix. But women have always been damned if they do and damned if they don’t on either side of the working mom/stay-at-home war frontlines. When’s the last time you read or heard about court documents claiming that male fire fighters who are summoned to work 24/7 in an emergency can’t be good fathers? Or CEOs whose Blackberries send the buzz, and they go racing off to the office to mandate a lay off? Should traveling salesmen lose custody of their kids?

Yes, divorce is horrific. It’s hard on kids. It’s hard on parents. But, it’s refreshing to see in this case that the LA judge gets that dad and mom have a right to work and pursue their “next.” Rutherford and Giersch need to chill out and get on with the business of sharing custody and focus on building a future for their children from the ashes of their marriage.

What do you think? Is a TV actress’ lifestyle OK for raising kids? Or should she give up or put her career on hold?

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