The Dating Game
Should I Stay or Should I Go?
Is it time to hit the road, Jack?
It’s a question that pops up at some point in nearly every relationship, unless you’re living the Stepford high life. Should you love him or leave him?
If you find yourself repeatedly doubting his worthiness – or your friends drop subtle hints or take out billboards to that effect – it may be time to fish or cut bait.
While we’re all for working on making it work, sometimes you’re better off throwing back your catch before he stinks up your life.
Here are some signs that it’s time to say buh-bye to your guy.
1. You don’t want to introduce him to your friends. If you’re embarrassed about your man or worried he’ll do something dorky, dangerous or dumb (counterfeiting promissory notes, anyone?) – then, duh! Why would you want to hang out with him in the first place? The guy you pick should be like a sparkling diamond ring you want to show off to the world, not hide away in the back of your sock drawer.
2. You don’t respect each other. A solid romance requires partners who trust, respect and challenge each other. If you don’t feel comfortable with each others’ opinions, thoughts, jobs or lifestyle, then why waste your time?
3. He tries to separate you from your friends, family or hobbies. Sure, couple time is critical. But that doesn’t mean your whole world should stop just because you’re dating someone. This is your life, ladies, so make sure you land the starring role.
4. You don’t talk to each other. Yes, women get a bad rap for wanting to “talk it out.” But conversation is critical – especially for long-term loves. If you’re going to grow old together, you better have something to talk about all those years!
5. He hurts you or threatens you in any way. Physical, emotional or verbal abuse is not just a red light. It’s a screaming siren telling you to run the other way as fast as you can. Life is far too short and precious to spend even one moment with a hurtful jerk.
For more tips on identifying losers and abusers, check out psychologist Joseph M. Carver’s pointers on FeministJournal.com.