Mean Betty on One Cornell Sorority’s Dress Code
You best be paying attention to Mean Betty, ladies!
Ah, kittens, is there anything more inspiring than the call to higher education, the promise of that tasseled cap and hard-earned college degree, the hallowed halls of learning and … a ban on muffin tops?
Mean Betty was simply delighted to read on the Huffington Post this adorable, insightful dress code banning, among other things, muffin tops, from one of Cornell’s sororities, the Pi Phis. Why the delight? Why, isn’t it fun to have someone to celebrate other than those poor celebs?
And more to the point – who if not the Greek girls of Cornell will lead the crusade against such abominations as the aforementioned muffin top, the camel toe and … heaven forbid … SATIN?!
“No one looks good in satin dresses unless its from Betsey Johnson or Dolce and Gabbana, you weigh less than 130 pounds, have 3 pairs of spanks on and it’s New Years Eve.”
Got that? Mean Betty couldn’t have put it better herself.
A few more key points from the document, which was apparently leaked by some jealous meanie to IvyGateBlog.com (obviously a grouchy, unpopular, satin-wearing girl with a misguided notion that college should be about coming into one’s own, expanding one’s horizons, even learning – and not what it’s really about: having the proper amount of lip gloss and, God forbid, not wearing WHITE shoes to rush!):
The Code says YES to:
– Proper shoes: “PRETTY HEELS. Heeled boots if you must. Nice flats: Tory Burch. Boots: love…worn OVER pants.” (Why, Mean Betty love too! Worn OVER pants of course!)
– “Blazers: Yes, please!” (Can we ever have too many blazers? No.)
– “Shaved legs.” (Well of course! Who do you think you are, Mo’nique?)
– “Preferably no short sleeves – recommended: full coverage aka elbow length, 3/4 length, long, thin layers.” (Yes, please, spare us from the sight of your 20-year-old arms. Who do you think you are, Madonna?)