The Newlywed Life: I'm Losing My Single Friends

Does getting married mean saying good-bye to your single friends?
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Two women arguingBut it’s more than a birthday call. And more than the interest in wedding planning … it is the fact that I feel like my BFF has abandoned me. Again, in her defense she may feel like I was the one who did the walking away — I’m no longer as available to watch Sox games and go shopping on Saturdays — but isn’t everyone these day equally biz?

But I’m wondering … was she being a jerk because she thought I had changed? I mean I get that there ain’t much exciting about married life. (All those fabulously successfully sitcoms were about dating, not marriage.) And I’m pretty positive that listening to me talk about comparative mortgage analysis is bo-ring, but I don’t think that being married has made me into a drone type. I still have wine and whine seshes with the ladies and I enjoyed watching my team clinch the Wild Card. So why aren’t we on the same page?

I know I’m not alone. My dear friend KiKi essentially lost contact with her brother when she got hitched. They were the best of friends but something shifted when she said, “I do.” Now they talk, but it isn’t like it used to be. And Sharon said that her bridesmaid fell off the map post-nups.

Tell me. Have you had life-long relationships shift because of your marriage?

Read the last story in this series: The Newlywed Life: Our First Fight


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0 thoughts on “The Newlywed Life: I'm Losing My Single Friends

  1. FBNYC says:

    Happy birthday! I’m sorry your friend ditched you… I feel like this happens even if you start dating someone, not necessarily just when you get married. I think friends who are single just assume you will change and get all “coupley” so they distance themselves first before you do.

  2. shelby says:

    You are sure that you didnt pull away first? My “BFF” thinks that we are still the same as always. its not true. we were best friends for 2yrs, did everything together, talked and saw each other 6 days a wk. then she got a bf. that wasnt bad until she no longer had time.. she wld cancel get togethers, then the day the man i thought i was going to marry dumbed me… i called her and had to ASK her to come be with me. her response was “i just made my __ a pie… i guess i can come 4 5min. by then of course i said forget it. my point is she did this and a whole lot more, so are you certain that you didnt pull away first?

  3. justanothergirl says:

    well think of it this way.. put yourself in her shoes..

    she’s getting married.. great.. -pause..
    better get use to her not being around..
    who else have i got to wipe my tears now..

    metaphorically.. like a shoelace on a shoe.. you can replace it anytime..
    but replaced is more likely to be lost and forgotten than used again..

    point is.. if she told you that.. you might have been psyched for a bit.. till you realize.. though she might have just gained a life long partner.. you just lost your other half..

    you’re gonna be too busy for her..
    you’re gonna have less common interest..
    she’s afraid.. and knows she’s about to be left out.. so why hang on? and really an email on her birthday? how thoughtful..
    but bff wise? err not so thoughtful.. where are you? home with your husband cuddling.. her? single.. prolly will have mindless sex thats not even worth remembering tomorrow..

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