ASK REAL GUYS
What Happened to Our Sex Life?
Dear ASK REAL GUYS: My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over six months. We have a great relationship and I’m really happy in every area accept for one … the bedroom. At first the sex was amazing; it was frequent and he was very giving, but after a few months it started to dwindle, eventually only happening every two weeks after I pressure him into it. We’re both 24 years old and should be in our prime, as far as sex goes. We’ve had many talks about why he’s no longer interested in having sex. He’s told me it’s because one of his ex girlfriends cheated on him and almost gave him an STD and one stopped taking birth control without telling him, got pregnant and eventually had to get an abortion.
I know this is a trust issue but I’m not sure how he’ll ever be able to see sex as a healthy part of a relationship after what’s happened to him. I love him and want this to work out, but only having sex every couple of weeks is driving me crazy. Is there anything we can do?
Avery: First of all, your boyfriend should understand that only having sex every couple of weeks doesn’t prevent or avoid him from getting you pregnant or getting an STD. There’s something else going on here. Maybe he’s just bored. Maybe your boyfriend – who you really don’t know THAT well yet – is more interested in the chase and something being new, than something long term. I think that you should ask him more about his past relationships. I bet you’d find out that there’s a pattern there. If he’s only into a woman in the beginning, you have some decisions to make.