Julie Spira, author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, ventured forth on 250 online dates, earning several marriage proposals – and a husband – in the process. She says she’s not at all surprised by the Match marriage results:
“Not a day goes by that I don’t hear a story about someone who has met his or her spouse online,” she says. “Hoping that you might meet someone while out at a club or social event could have a high price tag and you most likely will come home empty-handed. There comes a time in your life when your friends aren’t fixing you up anymore. Online dating has become an efficient way for busy singles to meet their spouses – it’s truly a numbers game.”
And those numbers are crucial. Online dating is exponentially powerful, in that it opens you up to meeting men in general. When I scribbled out my first profile, I was terribly lonesome and frankly, terrified of dating. But online dating forced braveness upon me. With practice, it put me in peak form and opened my eyes to the sea of men around me. I was suddenly meeting guys everywhere I turned. At restaurants, in the gym – literally on the back of a bus.
Yes, mistakes were made. By me, by them, by them again and again and again. But it wasn’t such a big deal. I could click these guys into and out of my life as necessary. I could decide exactly what I wanted in a guy – then change my mind with a few keystrokes.
The whole enterprise is a bit magical when you think about it. It reminds me of a bizarrely addictive public television show I used to watch as a kid in Nebraska. In the show (Once Upon a Time), a beautiful librarian named Marion was captured by Kerfumbly the witch. Cruel Kerfumbly demanded a new story each day. But Marion was a clever bibliophile. She fed ingredients for a story (say a slimy frog or a lost sock) into a magical machine that would literally crank out books to appease Kerfumbly.
With online dating, we get to feed the ingredients for our perfect husband into the Internet machine, crank the handle – and watch him appear before our very eyes.
That, my friends, is a true story.
Tell us: Where did you meet your husband or boyfriend?
Carrie Seim, Betty’s L.A. Correspondent, is a writer and comedian keeping it real in L.A., New York and @ carrieseim.com.