The Newlywed Life: Too Soon for a Baby?

We've only been married for 6 weeks - but the baby pressure is already on full force.
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The Newlywed Life: Too Soon for a Baby?

We’ve only been married for 6 weeks – but the baby pressure is already on full force.

-Jenna Mahoney

A car with a

In the first six weeks of our marriage, we have attended two one-year old birthday parties, one baby shower and a handful of “we’re pregnant” dinners out. And with each little announcement and every oooh over a onesie, we inevitably get the Q: “What’s up with you? When are you having a family?”

To which, I’d like to respond: “It’s none of your beeswax,” but my mother raised me better than that. So, I pretend I didn’t hear the question. Or I smile and reposition the focus to the questioner. (Best example of that technique was at my wedding reception when one of my mom’s friends dropped the F word. I simply asked her when her single daughter was getting married …)

Kate GosselinThe truth is we should be starting a family (I’m 33 and stats say that after 35 it is a darn struggle to get pregnant), but we’d like to revel in the newlywed bliss a little longer. And well, I don’t feel ready. In my mind my requirements for parenthood include owning a home, having lots of savings for education and not being embarrassed to walk out of the house looking like Kate Gosselin (translation: Having “mom” hair). And we are so not near any of those goals yet. Husband is on board with the house first plan, but he thinks the adaptation to mom hair is all in my head. He also thinks that the pressure cooker is all in my head. To which I say, ahem. Fact: My MD tells me the longer we wait, the worse my chances and the risks for the wee one. Fact: My mom and mother-in-law insist that being an old mommy isn’t fun for anyone. So we should just get on to the trying train, but then there’s the other reason I’m a little skittish about the whole F word — I’m, um, well, I’m not so sure I’d be a good mom.

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0 thoughts on “The Newlywed Life: Too Soon for a Baby?

  1. You are just going through the same things other newlyweds do – if you want to wait to have kids, wait. If you don’t, then don’t. However – you can’t let your fear of possibly being a bad parent rule your decision. There aren’t any perfect parents that I know – and that includes me. Good luck on whatever decision you make – all I can tell you is that kids will definitely change your life!

  2. what’s with the age obsession?! you are young and at 35 you still are young! there are not many women nowadays who decide to have children before that. it really isn’t a bad age to start having children! my mom had me with 33, then my sister with 37! and that was 29 years ago, without the help of the moderm technology or chemical discovering!

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