Between the Sheets
The Truth About Porn
When is pornography cause for concern? How much is normal, and how much is … too much?
-Amber Madison, Betty’s Sexpert
Your man’s dirty movie habit may be hard for you to wrap your head around – does this mean he wishes you had triple Ds, lesbian tendencies, and a Brazilian? The idea of his pornography viewing may even upset you – here’s someone to whom you’re deeply committed looking at other women naked. Perhaps you think it’s hurting your relationship, your sex life, or that your guy may even be addicted. But before you go so far as to disconnect the cable, read this.
When someone enters a monogamous relationship they maintain the right to sleep with one person besides you: themselves. And for many guys who don’t have the most vivid imaginations, masturbation is a lot easier with something to look at, i.e. porn. But if you’re like many women, the thought of your guy watching it makes you squirm. Understandably, the idea of your guy getting aroused by – or possibly even fantasizing about having sex with – another woman, is upsetting. However, the majority of porn that guys watch is not women parading around naked, it’s men and women having sex (and if it makes you feel better, most porn stars aren’t exactly supermodels). Your guy isn’t necessarily being aroused by the woman herself, as much as he is being aroused by watching sex.
Chances are, you would be aroused by watching sex too. It’s not just a guy thing. Studies show that women get just as turned on watching pornography as men do. The only difference: they are less likely to admit it.