The Winners and Losers at the VMAs

Kanye West acts like a jerk, Janet Jackson brings the house to its feet, the trailer for New Moon rocks, and Lady Gaga is just weird
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The Winners and Losers at the VMAs

Kanye West acts like a jerk, Janet Jackson brings the house to its feet, the extended trailer for New Moon rocks, Lady Gaga is just weird and more — BettyConfidential hands out its own awards for last night’s VMAs

Kathy Campbell

MTV VMAs

The MTV Video Music Awards didn’t disappoint on Sunday with laughter, tears, profanity, shocks, hot numbers (we’re not just talking about dresses) and more. BettyConfidential has some awards of our own to give out based on the night’s best and worst moments. And the winners are:

The Best Yet Saddest Moment of the Night Award: Tribute to Michael Jackson

Madonna and Janet

Madonna gave a tearful, touching opening speech at the VMAs about the King of Pop where she remarked that she and Michael Jackson, who were born the same year, had many things in common, but there was one marked difference: “I never had a mother but he never had a childhood… I think he got the short end of the stick.” She ended by telling the audience that her two sons (Rocco, 9, and David, 4) are fans of the late King of Pop and revealed, “There’s a whole lot of crotch grabbing and Moonwalking going on in my house.”

Her speech was followed by a group of dancers, performing moves from “Thriller,” “Bad” and “Smooth Criminal,” before the video for “Scream” came on and Michael’s sister Janet appeared. She sang along as Michael lamented, “Stop pressuring me… makes me want to scream” and then danced in almost perfect sync with her brother. As Madonna put it, “Sometimes we lose things before we can truly appreciate them.”

The Most Censored Opening Monologue Award: Russell Brand

Russell Brand

We knew (and hoped) that Russell Brand would be as provocative as he was when he hosted the VMAs last year, and he didn’t disappoint, but did he really need to say he was staring at Katie Perry’s “glorious entrance” from under the stage, or that he was trying to f*** Lady Gaga despite (or because of) rumors that she is a hermaphrodite, or go into explicit details when explaining that the Brits call a fanny a vagina? We love Russell, but as the great Groucho Marx said “playing dirty” is the cheapest way to get a laugh. Please Mr. Shagger of the Year, try harder next time. And we don’t mean that in the way you’re probably going to take it.


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0 thoughts on “The Winners and Losers at the VMAs

  1. Ann13 says:

    Lady Gaga totally gave me nightmares. What was with her appearance? I know she’s strange and always out to surprise people … but …

  2. 24glow says:

    Kanye West is an ass. He always has been. People should boo him right out of the business. Karma will be his bitch someday.
    And Lady Gaga…why are these people so weird? Is it because they have no talent?

  3. needcoffee says:

    this is a great recap! and kayne, omg, just sad. will be hearing of him entering rehab soon?

  4. MarylandMom5 says:

    Kanye…go away! Or grow up!

  5. Fern says:

    this is great — and you’re totally right about Kanye!

  6. bkstar says:

    Kanye’s mom must be in heaven looking down and shaking her head. It was aweful to watch – i felt bad for Taylor and the look on Beyonce’s face was priceless

  7. bryony1 says:

    When is there going to be an award for Nastiest Dancer. it’s nice to know that Lady GaGa, Beyonce, and others are very limber, but I’m sick of seeing pumping pubes by so-called legitimate stars.. And you haven’t seen anything yet if you haven’t seen Madonna’s newest video, in which she actually humps her hands. And Beyonce’s “Single Ladies (Put a ring on it)” keeps you confused to just which “it” she means until her award version, anyway, by pointing to marriage ring finger. Otherwise you’d never know. And don’t think it’s not possible to put rings in the other “it.” Both Linda Lovelace and Marilyn Chambers wore them, hooked to gold chain leashes. Is that trusting or just disgusting?

    Anyway, the introduction of graphic sex moves into videos and performances just goes to make up for the wasteland that is most modern “songs” of today.

    I’m very liberal, but I think these women appear whorish self-deprecating when their moves imitate the hottest of hot sex. The guys are about as bad, but no one really stands out the way Michael Jackson and his crotch-grabbing did. He set an example that’s sure to be followed, but i think will be more dangerous as far as men go because you know once they get hold they don’t like to let go. Footwork can’t hold a candle to crochwork.

    What’s up next? Best Masturbation Performed to Music award?

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