Waiting For Him To Call – Tips From Your Gay Best Friend

How long should you wait for him to call? Should you leave him a voicemail? Our gay BFF has the answers.
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Waiting For Him To Call — Tips From Your Gay Best Friend

How long should you wait for him to call? Should you leave him a voicemail? Our gay BFF has the answers.

-Brian Clark

waiting for him to call

The time-span between a good date and the follow-up phone call is a no-man’s land.

Literally. Men vanish into thin air during this time faster than a squirrelly ex-con with a bag of money, leaving us to wonder if they’ll ever call and if so, when. It’s torture. We’ve all felt it. And like the show Cops, it’s not going away (warning to readers: I’ve been waiting for a post-date call from a guy and the resulting insomnia has kept me up all night watching syndicated police shows). Anyway, here’s how to cope until the phone rings:

Zen and the art of assuming
For me, the first “when will he call?” stirrings set in at about 9:15 the morning after the first date. By then, I’ve snooze-buttoned my way through breakfast (insomnia takes its toll), rushed to work and am at my desk fighting the urge to call my new beau. Surely, my date has performed the exact same morning routine and is now sitting in his equally lonely office fighting the urge to call me too. Right?

Read 5 Secrets About First Dates – From Your Gay Best Friend

Wrong! Men (and women) are busy. And not everyone’s schedules are the same. Don’t assume that just because a guy met you (as amazing as we know you are) on Tuesday, that he’s going to be able clear his Wednesday schedule to make his next romantic move. Have patience. Lots of it. After all, he’s probably just gone undercover to bust an international car theft ring. But if (like me) you can’t or don’t have patience, keep reading.

Distract yourself
Too often, after a good date, I forget all about myself. Suddenly, some near-stranger with broad shoulders and a gravely voice has eclipsed all of my other thoughts. I forget to do laundry, to feed the fish or to DVR CSI Miami. Then I wonder why I feel bad about myself when this person who I’ve given too much power to doesn’t call right away.

Don’t be like me. Instead, distract yourself by investing in yourself. Anything will do as long as it’s about you! Make plans to go out with your besties, plan a date with another potential suitor (this one really works), revamp your resume so you nail that next job interview or even re-read and comment on relevant BettyConfidential articles (yes, a shameless plug).


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14 thoughts on “Waiting For Him To Call – Tips From Your Gay Best Friend

  1. FBNYC says:

    Great advice gay BFF!

  2. livetogossip says:

    I want him to be my gay BFF!

  3. jessica03 says:

    I’m gonna find myself a gay BFF!

  4. blondeelicious says:

    “He’s Just Not That Into You” this is THE bible for women as far as dating goes. I knew so many of the points already but to see it in black and white really gives you a fresh perspective and a confidence boost that you really do NOT have to settle for anything less than stellar treatment (this doesn’t mean being unrealistic either, just honest with yourself).

  5. uptowngirl says:

    I usually just keep myself busy and try not to think about it. I give myself a deadline: if he doesn’t call in 2 or 3 days, I try him. If he doesn’t respond, we’re done.

  6. flingthebook says:

    Remember: the watched pot never boils.

  7. citymouse says:

    Gay BFF is SOOOO right about the guy who doesn’t call being “bad news” — why even go there! Definitely need to remember this next time…

  8. violetgal says:

    LOL I’m waiting as we speak!!

  9. Fern says:

    I love the Gay BFF!!! Such fantastic advice

  10. Fern says:

    ps – flingthebook: I always thought it was the “watch pot” — now I finally get it — “watched pot” makes so much more sense. hahaha!

  11. NYCdogmommy says:

    Oh gawd, I always fall into this trap. I either stare at my email willing a message from HIM to drop in or stare at my phone waiting for a call. No wonder I’m getting more and more near-sighted.
    SIGH!

  12. sah0128 says:

    What do you do when the person tat doesnt call is your own boyfriend?

  13. kliis says:

    I try to distract myself, but sadly it doesn’t always work! I end up calling which I know.. GASP! I’m such a modernist.. but actually, i’m much more of a traditionalist with no patience :) anyway, thanks for the once again wonderful advice. I laughed at most parts.

  14. Lea says:

    Funny that I ran across this, I'm waiting for THE CALL from a cop!

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