What We Learned from Men's Magazines in March

Yes, they're excited to drink green beer on St. Patrick's Day, but here's 10 things we learned about men this month from their favorite magazines.
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What We Learned from Men’s Magazines in March

Yes, they’re excited to drink green beer on St. Patrick’s Day, but here’s 10 things we learned about men this month from their favorite magazines.

-Faye Brennan

What We Learned from Men's Magazines in March

Men’s magazines were all about Hollywood this month, mainly, the leading men of the big screen (it is award season, after all). Check out what we discovered about these actors – and average guys, too – from reading March’s men’s magazines.

1. They need to “release” often in order to avoid prostate cancer.
According to a surprising statistic in this month’s Men’s Fitness, men need to ejaculate at least 21 times per month in order to lower their risk of prostate cancer. If you do the math, this tidbit – which comes from The Journal of the American Medical Association – breaks down to about five times a week, and now counts as the greatest excuse a guy can use to get you to sleep with him every night. “But, babe, I haven’t reached 21 times yet!”

Read 8 Biggest Sex Myths

2. They know they’re terrible at listening to us.
In a section called “Things We Think We’ve Figured Out,” GQ editors speak for men everywhere when they say they stink at listening. Trust us, that’s old news! Their advice to other men who also lack the skill: “Just be quiet. Please. For her. Stare into her eyes and be quiet. Give her advice only when she asks for it.”

Bruce Willis

3. Bruce Willis may be the smartest man alive.
In the March issue of Men’s Journal, Bruce Willis treats readers to some of his most insightful thoughts, including his belief that women, well, kind of rule. “Women can see through their own guy’s s–t better than anybody can,” he tells Bill Zehme in “What Would Bruce Do?” “A woman can size up another woman in about 30 seconds… and they are right all the time. Dead right. They are working on a wavelength that men could never get to.” We knew we liked you, Bruce!

4. They think if they ignore us during dinner it will turn us on.
The tips Men’s Fitness writer Desiree Gallas offers guys in her story, “Make Her Simmer (All Day Long),” are all good, except for one. She advises them to send us naughty e-mails and texts throughout the day about the steamy sack session to come, which we definitely agree with. But if guys think that “being inaccessible” and “keeping your distance” during dinner at home is the way to heat us up, they’ll be severely disappointed. Odds are, we’ll think our hot night of nookie is cancelled due to a bad mood –and that’s something that tends to cool us off pretty quick.

men love beer5. They’d like to drink beer with every meal.
“Are you enjoying that dark stout draft with your vanilla ice cream, sir?” According to “Pairing Beer with Food,” in this month’s Men’s Journal, your guy’s answer may be a resounding “yes.” Writer David Ramsey asked beer experts for their top beer recommendations to go with a variety of different foods, including sushi, salad, and even chocolate cheesecake. Do any of these beer choices come with a free gym membership? We hope so!

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