What's the Best Age to Get Married?

When is the best time to get married?


What’s the Best Age to Get Married?

The truth about men and marriage proposals

-Carrie Seim

ArchieLast week on the subway in New York, I overheard three guys discussing another friend’s impending engagement.

“When he told me he bought her a ring, I almost started crying,” one of them declared, to a chorus of sighs.

They all chimed in about their pal’s doomed future.

“It’s such a mistake,” one muttered, “He’s way too young.”

These guys, I should add, were all about 30 years old.

It’s a conversation I’ve had a million times with friends of both genders and various sexual orientations – exactly when are we grown up enough for marriage? And why does there seem to exist an ever-growing divide between men and women over the most appropriate age for tying the knot?

Even Archie, the redheaded comic strip hero, finally settled down last week after 68 years of waffling between two potential brides. In a very disappointing (but realistic!) decision, he dumped sweetheart Betty in favor of vixen Veronica.

Everyone at this Web site wholeheartedly believes that Betty is far better off without ugly old Archie. (And not just because Bettys always root for Bettys.) Still, the news left me disturbed.

Why did it take Archie 68 years to make up his mind? I’m guessing Betty and Veronica were ready to make things official around year 40, year 41 tops. And what is it about a bad girl that leaves men falling at her stiletto-clad feet?

To get to the bottom of the great marriage age debate, I turned to some guy friends. And of course, Facebook.

The answers below are brutal, funny and (mostly) honest. Gird yourselves, ladies, and prepare to hear the truth about men and marriage proposals.

What is the best age for a man to marry?

“The perfect age is 40 since 30 is the new 20 and 40 is the new 30. Of course, the perfect age of my bride is still 27 to 29.”

“Depends. Is she the type of bride that can pick up English quickly, or does the catalog tell you she wants to bring some of her family over from Siberia to ‘get to know you’?”

“I didn’t know it was right for me until I knew. I realized that, unlike every other woman, my lady wasn’t bat sh*t crazy. It’s not so much right time, it’s right person.”

What’s the worst way for a woman to get you to propose?

“A lady with a marriage timeline? That’s a deal breaker. She’s not interested in you. She’s interested in keeping her mother at bay. Or she bows before the temple of outdated social mores that dictate all women be married by their 20s, reproduce in their 30s, and get nipped and tucked into Stepford acceptability by their 40s.”

“A girl that pressures me for a committed relationship gets shown out so I don’t have to deal with marriage heat.”

“Get pregnant shortly before her mother runs for vice president.”

OK, so what tactics works best to snag a ring?

“Put a channel block on whatever network airs Bridezillas.”

“Tell him you’re pregnant. Duh. Then have a ‘miscarriage’ on the honeymoon. This has the benefit of both playing on his guilt and allowing you to gain weight before your wedding day.”

“Three words: I. Am. Dying.”

“If a girl is hot, rich and willing to satisfy my every sexual desire I am willing to enter into an 8-to-12 week probationary period.”

“Pledge to never get too fat, go too crazy or bring your parents over for more than two hours (per month). Also, put on a cooking expedition. Show off your 4-H skills. Have a skills competition or expo. Wife Expo 09! And if you’re really serious, promise Friday morning b.j.s.”

Read more on love and sex: Sexual Fantasies: Are You “Normal”? and Debating Dating a Lesbian

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0 thoughts on “What's the Best Age to Get Married?

  1. Why do we have to get married at all? If a couple are dedicated enough, marriage doesn’t have to be a factor. When you’re mature enough to make a commitment, you’re mature enough to make a commitment, I guess.

  2. it will always be a long debate between men and women on appropriate age. while women are becoming increasingly independent and want to achieve success before getting married, men are looking to marry fine young things. i’m going to be forced to marry a man 20 years older than me? uh, no thanks.

  3. I think late 20s is perfect. you’ve had time live solo and define yourself, yet your young enough that you (hopefully) haven’t lost much fertility.

  4. I have friends who are marrying now, but I do not find myself anywhere near ready for it yet. So I think it depends on the person or the couple. Call me a hippie, but I believe that timing is everything and everything happens for a reason. What is good for one couple may not be good for another.

  5. I’m 22, and already, friends my age are jumping the broom. I think it’s crazy to get married straight out of college. I’ll be ready when I’m completely stable on my own, and have planned for some time, how my life may go.

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