Why You Should Date Men Raised By Single Moms

Six reasons single-mama-men will rock your world.
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Why You Should Date Men Raised By Single Moms

Six reasons single-mama-men will rock your world.

-Carrie Seim

A man with his mom

Ladies, take out your notebooks. I’m about to divulge one of my biggest dating secrets. You want to find a truly amazing partner? A grown-up guy who’s got his you-know-what together? A dude who will rarely let you down?

Pick a man who was raised by a single mom.

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Pundits like to decry single-parent families as the downfall of our civilization. Many studies have focused on the difficulties children raised in single-family homes face (including school troubles, substance abuse and divorce later in life), although many of these studies fail to control for the lower socioeconomic status of the children involved. Rarely mentioned? Despite all their hardships, single-parent families can also produce strong, solid and immensely dateable young men.

I’ve lived with male roommates for many years. Whenever my friends drop by, they can’t get over how clean and tidy our house is. “You live here with four guys?” they ask, incredulous. “Yep,” I respond. “They’re usually neater than I am.” I attribute the boys’ superior household habits to their amazing mothers, who raised them (mostly) all on their own.

They’re the guys I call if my car breaks down, a date dumps me or a spider creeps into my room. These single-mama-men do what they say they’ll do, show up where they’re supposed to and almost always remember to change the toilet paper roll. What more could you want in a husband-to-be?

Manhattan psychologist Dr. Joseph Cilona cautions against taking these individual stand-outs and making generalizations about all men raised by single moms, reminding us that “a mother who has very poor parenting skills or is abusive and neglectful can create the opposite effect and make it much more likely that the man will grow up with serious problems relating to women and in relationships.”

However, he adds, “Men raised exclusively by women may have an advantage over those who are not when it comes to things like effective communication, insight into emotionality and expressiveness.”

My own (terribly unscientific) theory is that these men had a lot of practice taking care of themselves and taking care of women – or at least being on the same team as the women in their lives. They learned from a young age much of the “husband training” most men learn oh-so-late in life from their exasperated girlfriends.

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11 thoughts on “Why You Should Date Men Raised By Single Moms

  1. theseangeleyez says:

    I agree. My husband was raised by his mother from the age of 8. She has 2 other sons and also, and all 3 of them are family men and take cake of their responsibilities. I have never had a man who treated me better than my husband.

  2. mynxbaby says:

    I diagree with this since my ex was slob, abusive, lazy, thief, and wouldn’t let go of the mama’s !!!!!!!!! you know what I am trying to say. His twin was the same way. Losers This Mother has nothing to be proud of for raising them. She was married 3 times, gave her daughter to be raised by the grandmother and kept the boys to turn them into jerks too. The sister was older and now pampers these middle age men.

  3. hankie1 says:

    I was a single mom for many years, I raised three independent good husbands and fathers, they did their own laundry starting at age 10, they started learning to cook at 12 they mowed the lawns washed the car, they worked their way through college, I’m very proud of my boys, they are in no way momma’s boys just strong men. My first husband (their father) was raised by a totting mother with both parents there, both of the men made lousy husbands..

  4. onenine08 says:

    This article is so NOT true. Men raised by single moms are not all of these things. Mine is a great communicator, but his mom takes up too much of his focus. He feels like he still needs to taker care of her. I wish his moma would get a man and leave mine alone! :-(

  5. Athirson says:

    You should date this type only if, on the off-chance, you are attracted to mama's-boys. The reason being, of course, is that a boy needs a MAN to teach him how to be a man. No woman can do this. If you want a man, date one who had sufficient nmale influence in his life.

    1. lina says:

      Oh really? A boy needs a man to teach them? What exactly? You don't seen to make a difference between genders and quality of education. It is very simplistic.

  6. justanothergirl says:

    I think everyone might be reading this wrongly.. It talked about men being raised by 1 parent.. Although mostly women.. Anyway.. It didn’t say anything about mama’s boy.. And not everyone grows up the same.. The article is saying.. Some men.. Who were raised by single parents.. Are actually a lot better dating wise than men that are raise by both parents.. But not all men.. So ease up.. I think it’s a pretty good read.. It made sense..

    I’ve dated a few mama’s boy.. And boys who helped their moms as they grew up.. Big difference..

  7. middleagemom says:

    The article does caution against making generalizations and that poor parenting skills, abuse, neglect can cause serious problems. It

  8. Christopher Prophet says:

    Please allow a man who was raised by a single mother to weigh in on this subject laddies if you will. My mother had me when she was very young and did not marry my father. This added extra responsibilities growing up that I learned from her. So I do like to look good and keep a clean house. I know how to cook only using a microwave though. My mom was frequently at work being single so there are things I missed out on. I also have two sisters my mother raised and my grandmother helped out with raising me much. Being raised by women I am much more comfortable with them. I can read women better than most men and so I relate to them well. This is a quality women tell me they appreciate. But I taught myself to be a man when I came to realize that women didn’t appreciate my being needy that I believe that I got from little male influence and my mother always having to work. It has been hard to teach myself to be a man and to relate to men. I have always loved women and appreciate them very much for the qualities they bring to the world. But before women could appreciate me, I had to teach myself to be a man through much effort and years. In conclusion a man raised by a single woman may have benefits in relation to women, but they will also have to teach themselves to be a mam. Most are not able to do this at all, and of the ones that try many do a terrible job. A good job takes maturity learned from years of trial and error.

  9. Chelle123 says:

    In response to onenine08, just wait until you have a son, until then please dont tell a mom to leave her son alone. I am not a single mother, although I was raised by one, but ur boys are always ur boys, even when they find spouses! You should respect that!!! My husband is still close to his mom, and weve been married 16 years. He is a wonderful man because of her, not in spite of her.

  10. kori_k says:

    I am a single mom. I left my ex for emotional abuse on me and my son along with his other 2 kids from previous marriage in which he had custody of them. Tho i do not make much money, I am not an irresponsible mom either. We dont have the means to get everything we want and or do things like others get to do. However its in my sons best interest that ne not be raised by his father. He is 12 and doesnt agree at this time even tho he knows and remembers how his dad is. How a child may become in adulthood is yes subject to what he experiences as a child. However though i hope he turns out to be a loving patient, understanding, helpful man. I cant guarantee that because he still has dad. Who sti has influence on him that i dont have alot of control over. The strength and understanding that a childs mind has is the key factor i believe in what they will be like. My ex still manipulates him and i am constantly having to undo that when my son comes home. My son would be this boy that women would want to marry if he didnt have his father in his life. Being trained by a man to be a man is onky good if the man training u is a good man. If not a woman can do it to the best of her ability. Thats where coaches, friends husbands, pastors etc come into play. Since his father is in his life i can only hope for the best and do the best i can to be a positive influence and place for him to vent or what have u. There is nothing wrong with being a mamas boy as long as mama knows her place.

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