A Real Guy Tells: How To Be Approachable Without Seeming Desperate

Flirt so men will feel comfortable talking to you, not want to run away!
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Read He Said, She Said: Why Don’t Guys Buy Girls Drink at the Bar Anymore?

DO:
Play with the boys! Pool, darts, cigars, Mario Kart, ball busting, whatever. We love it when there’s a girl that wants to get down and dirty with us! You’ll seem fun, adventurous and not too high maintenance for us. We might even let you win sometimes!

DON’T:
Make sure you let us have our boy time also. If you keep trying to play everything we are playing, it’s going to get old.  Sure it’s fun to run the pool table out one Saturday night with you. But if every time we hang out you want to muscle in on our fun, relaxation time, we won’t have fun or be relaxed. As much as we enjoy your company, sometimes we want some time for ourselves or our buds. Being “just one of the guys” is all well and good as long as you are “just one of the girls” as well. If you only want to play with us, you’ll look like you are trying WAY too hard and that you don’t have any other friends to do other stuff. Either that or you’ll start entering the “annoying kid sister” zone.

Hunt Ethridge is a dating columnist and a fashion writer. Currently he is the senior coach for New York Dating Coach. Also follow him on Twitter, @nydatingcoach.

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5 thoughts on “A Real Guy Tells: How To Be Approachable Without Seeming Desperate

  1. Fashionista says:

    Now here’s a guy who knows what he’s talking about! These are great tips. I’ve definitely been guilty of the last one — hanging out too much with the boys. But sometimes, it’s more fun to hang with the guys and have a drama-free night.

    But the one thing that I think Hunt is wrong about is the “wear an interesting hair clip” point. It’s like the scrunchie argument in Sex and the City… who wears a hair clip to the bar?

  2. baby fab says:

    informed guy, seems rude for some but honost at most

  3. Ally says:

    This was in no way possible written by a guy. This is a female writer.

  4. davile says:

    Tips for a great article, thank you for taking the time to share a little tip a great dantrik to other readers

  5. DJay says:

    There was a girl I saw on the street today at a bus stop. I was walking by and she seemed to be burning a hole into me with her eyes. Also she seemed to be looking more at my body than my face. The problem was I wasn't sure if she was looking at me cause she was interested or if she was just zoning out on me cause she wasn't really smiling enough so I didn't approach. If she would have looked me in the eye and quickly smiled and then looked away I would have taken it as a sure sign that its okay to approach her. However since she didn't do that I figured maybe her gaze was accidental and that she would just be rude to me for approaching her on the street…. Sigh. Why can't women ever do this part right?

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