Beware of Flashy Men!

Betty Blogger Carrie has been dumped by a hot hunk and eventually realizes why.
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Flashy manEven worse? I knew that just a few years (months?) ago, I would have gone running right into his arms. I would have answered his text just as cheerfully and breezily as it had been sent. I would have written the whole thing off to crazy travel timing and gone to meet him at midnight. Life is short, I used to think, why miss out on an adventure just for the sake of propriety?

There’s truth to all of that. But there’s a bigger truth as well: The adventure is infinitely superior with someone who cares enough about you to be honest and reliable.

What my South American chico didn’t know is that I’d done some growing up since our last meeting. I’d begun dating REAL men, who had their lives together. Men who called when they said they would. Men who showed up where they were supposed to. Men who didn’t hedge their bets by double booking themselves.

They were men – he was still a boy.

According to Dr. Lindstrom’s research using three-spined stickleback fish, which signal each other for breeding with enflamed red necks, it behooves females to “wait until ‘dishonest’ males have exhausted themselves in producing a flashy signal that they cannot sustain.”

I’m going to take Dr. L’s advice and stop wasting my time on those dishonest, flashy signals. I’m going to wait it out for someone a little less flashy and a lot more sustainable.

Read Carrie’s last blog: Terror (and Chex Mix) in the Skies

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0 thoughts on “Beware of Flashy Men!

  1. hope_xo says:

    So not into that flashy man thing.

  2. Fern says:

    I love the fish metaphor, going to use that more often

  3. Strong and Quirky says:

    haha, I wouldn’t want a flashy man anyway. He would try to outshine me! not acceptable

  4. avesidoj says:

    Good article, and its true to an extent… but its kind of like saying that beautiful, thin women who wear nice clothes are all golddigging bitches, why else would they look like that?

    I totally understand the point of the article, this is a very common attitude of very attractive men (I’m generally attracted to the chubby ones for this very reason) but its insulting to generalize so blatantly…

  5. khc1114 says:

    I think the flashy display has more to do with attitude. Guys who are just a bit cocky and are very assertive when they are flirting tend not to be relationship material – at least in my experience. I’ve tried to avoid guys who display a lot of bravado in the beginning.

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