Even worse? I knew that just a few years (months?) ago, I would have gone running right into his arms. I would have answered his text just as cheerfully and breezily as it had been sent. I would have written the whole thing off to crazy travel timing and gone to meet him at midnight. Life is short, I used to think, why miss out on an adventure just for the sake of propriety?
There’s truth to all of that. But there’s a bigger truth as well: The adventure is infinitely superior with someone who cares enough about you to be honest and reliable.
What my South American chico didn’t know is that I’d done some growing up since our last meeting. I’d begun dating REAL men, who had their lives together. Men who called when they said they would. Men who showed up where they were supposed to. Men who didn’t hedge their bets by double booking themselves.
They were men – he was still a boy.
According to Dr. Lindstrom’s research using three-spined stickleback fish, which signal each other for breeding with enflamed red necks, it behooves females to “wait until ‘dishonest’ males have exhausted themselves in producing a flashy signal that they cannot sustain.”
I’m going to take Dr. L’s advice and stop wasting my time on those dishonest, flashy signals. I’m going to wait it out for someone a little less flashy and a lot more sustainable.
Read Carrie’s last blog: Terror (and Chex Mix) in the Skies