Can You Take a Compliment? Or, How Saying “Thank You” Can Save Your Relationship
Never underestimate the worth of being able to take a compliment as well as give one!
Accepting a compliment, especially from a man, has never been easy for me. In fact, I probably spent most of my life shutting their compliments down before they could even get the words out. “You look amazing,” he would say. My response: “Oh god, what are you looking at? You need to get your eyes checked.”
“You have such a cute figure.” “Yeah right! Have you seen the cellulite on the back of my ass or my flabby thighs? Yuck!” “That color looks great on you.” “Sure. Whatever you say, this is all I had in my closet that didn’t make me look horrible.” If you are a woman shaking your head thinking, “Wow, I do that. That’s how I respond to his compliments,” you may be ruining your relationship.
Think about it. Why would any man want to be around someone who can’t accept a compliment? When a woman has a hard time accepting a man’s love and praise, it gets old quick. For starters, it usually means that the woman they are complimenting is seriously insecure, and being insecure means he has to constantly reassure her. Constantly reassuring her is a royal pain in the ass.
The truth is, you do not have to agree with his compliment. Hell, you don’t even have to believe it, but you do have to graciously accept it. Why? Because by shutting him down, you are not only “emotionally castrating” him, you are inadvertently calling him a liar. Ahem, essentially you are acting like a total bitch! There, I said it.
So, if you are one of those women who complains to your girlfriend that your husband or boyfriend never tells you how beautiful, sexy, smart, or (insert adjective) you are anymore, maybe you should take note or recall how you reacted toward his loving words when he was expressing his feelings to you.
So, what can you do to shift this and to avoid unconsciously slapping down the man you love?
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