Decoding Dating Profiles Part II: 10 More Guys You Want To Avoid

If his online dating profile has any of these red flags... move on to the next one, sweetheart!
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6. Contradiction Guy
This guy “Likes going out, but also enjoys staying in,” and possesses a “strong, but gentle nature.” His life is “complicated, yet simple,” and he is the type of guy that, get this, “likes to make plans, but also be spontaneous.” Ladies, here’s the deal with this guy: you could go out with him, or not go out with him, he’s totally fine with it either way.

7.  Ambiguously Gay Guy
Avoid any and all guys that say they will “do anything at least once,” and have “been to gay bars,” at their “friend’s invitation.” They will probably admit to having had at least one “man crush,” which more often than not ends up being Johnny Depp, Christian Bale, or Ryan Reynolds aka “RyRen.” The big tip off is when they say that they have “never gone ‘all the way’ with a guy and have zero interest in it.” But wait, there is however, a certain type of guy that “for whatever reason,” they are attracted to. To clarify, “only “in the ‘making out’ while drunk sort of way, definitely not in the holding hands and going to the movies sort of way.” Unless you’re a girl who really thinks sex is overrated and are therefore down with dating a “bi” now, “gay” later dude you’ll want to click “next”.   

Read Ask the Mouthy Housewives: Why Are His Eyes Closed During Sex?!

8. “Average Joe”
This guy uses the minimum number of required profile characters to share that he “likes to try new things and see new places.” He probably “likes to have fun,” and get this, on his days off, “likes to do various things.”  He of course is “open to meeting different types of people,” and really looking to “meet someone that he can get to know.” “B-to-the-oring! if you could really see yourself dating Forest Gump, and/or eating super bland rice every day for the rest of your life, by all means go ahead and send a wink.

9. Freudian Slip Guy
This guy might wrap up his profile by stating, “if interested, please massage me.” He is also more likely than not “looking forward to meating you,” and probably implored you to “feel free to wink and say bi”. Ladies, you definitely want to say “bye” to this guy as he’s got a one-track mind and is just looking to “get off” online dating, and not in a “meet the one so he can settle down” sort of way, if you catch my drift.

10.  Low Self Esteem Guy
This guy might describe himself as having a decent body “if you don’t mind fairly flabby with a bit of a gut.” He’ll probably throw in something mid-way to the effect of “I’m sure I already lost your attention and doubt you’re still reading this.”  You’ll notice this guy for the most part will keep his profile short and sweet, unless of course he’s decided to list all of his short-comings, not because he’s a man of few words, but just in case “you are not interested, at least [he] will not have wasted too much of your time.”

Tell us: what are some other online dating red flags you’ve noticed?

Amber SolettiOriginally from Austin, TX, Amber Soletti has been living the single life in NYC since 2000. A marketing professional, Amber worked in the beauty industry for Fortune 500 companies including Aveda and Avon. In an effort to subsidize her dating life and income, in 2008 she co–founded what would soon become NYC’s hottest dating service. Amber has written many published articles on dating advice and the NYC singles scene. She, along with her companies OnSpeedDating, SingleAndTheCity & Kissburg have been featured by The New York Times, Howard Stern, Regis & Kelly, The New York Post, What Not To Wear, Dateline NBC, Good Day NY, CNN and more.

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0 thoughts on “Decoding Dating Profiles Part II: 10 More Guys You Want To Avoid

  1. if he ask you to deposit some money orders and wire the funds to him since he is unable to get to the bank… this happen to me and once it was done I was $3G in the hole with the bank becuase the money orders were forgery! and of course the “guy” in question vanishes!! I was so mad that I let myself get con, lesson learned!

  2. I’ve found the guy that says “I’m easy going or laid back” means I have to make all the decisions on where we go, what restauraunt, what movie, etc. Be a man make a decision don’t put it all on me.

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