Just another Manic Mommy
Dear Manic Mommy: My name is Patty. I am a very proud mom to two, and one stepson. My stepson is 15, my daughter is 10 and my youngest son is 8. My stepson has always been raised by me, he does not know his own mom. The problem I am having though, is the younger son seems to be feeling left out. Or like he is not wanted. I am not sure why, and have tried so many things to help him feel better. He has been acting out and causing the whole house to be is disarray. It’s been a nightmare. I really need some advice please.
Manic Mommy: You didn’t get into what kind of acting out your son is doing, but as long as he’s not harming himself or those around him, I think that it’s normal for a child to act out on occasion. I’m not sure how long this has been happening in your family, but I think that maybe he could use some one-on-one time with you and his father. With our three children, my husband and I take turns taking each one of them on a date periodically. This gives the child a sense of importance, and he gets to choose an activity he might like best, whether it’s a trip for ice cream or a movie. The one-on-one time between parent and child is important and so much fun without the distraction of siblings bickering. It’s also a good opportunity to talk with him about his fears or what’s bothering him. He may open up to you when you are alone.
It doesn’t sound like he’s jealous that you have a stepson, but that he is going through a phase and needs to be reassured of his place in the family. Both you and your husband can try to take some extra steps to offer love and reassurance, and hopefully this is a phase he will outgrow. Good luck!