Ask for help. A friend can be a great motivator to help you reach your goals, as long as you choose wisely. “Pick someone who loves going to the gym,” says Halverson. “If it’s already a part of their regular routine, that’s the person who will say, ‘Come on, let’s go!’ when you say you don’t want to go.”
Talk to your family when your lifestyle changes—such as serving more wholesome meals or picking them up a half hour later so you can go to the gym—will affect them. “Many women will give up on their goals if they feel like it’s disrupting the family,” says Markman. “If you really have something you need to change, there is going to be disruption. Find out what you can do to make sure they don’t feel like they’ve lost something important.”
Anticipate setbacks. If the dessert menu is your weight loss weakness or the couch sounds more appealing than the treadmill after a long day at work, then try making a contingency plan—a technique that psychologists refer to as “if/then planning.”
The strategy is simple: Make a list of the triggers that could stop you from reaching your goal and decide how you want to react in each of those situations. “Have a plan in advance,” says Markman. “If you want to lose weight, what will you do when there’s a gorgeous buffet at a party? Who will take care of the kids if you’re at the gym?”
That strategy primes you for success. “The reason it works so well is you don’t miss opportunities to act,” says Halverson. “When you make an if/then plan, your brain on an unconscious level starts scanning for that moment to occur.” You won’t need willpower when temptation knocks on your door—you’ll have already decided what to do.
Have patience. “The goal doesn’t need to be reached in a day or a week or even a month,” says Markman. “You want to be on the road toward the goal.” That might mean slow progress, but small victories are the ticket to lasting success. “It’s got to be about doing a little bit better this week than last week,” says Halverson. “It’s about improvement, not perfection.”
Several years ago, after a string of yo-yo diets, Halverson finally applied her own strategies and lost the 50 pounds she put on during her pregnancy. “It took me almost two years, but I lost it,” she says. Because she had the patience to lose the weight slowly, her lifestyle habits had time to adapt and she’s been able to keep the weight off.
This year, you can do it too.
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