Mean Betty: Mel Gibson vs. The Footlong Cheeseburger

Which is more revolting? You decide!

Mean Betty: Mel Gibson vs. The Footlong Cheeseburger

Which is more revolting? You decide!

-Mean Betty

Mel Gibson vs. The Footlong Cheeseburger

Mean Betty has a confession to make, darlings. She’s been listening to audio of that psychopath Mel Gibson ranting and raving every night before bed. It really lulls a gal to sleep.

The moment the recording gets to the part where he yells, “I bend over backwards with my balls in a knot,” Mean Betty is out like a light. Mel Gibson is so the new Ambien. Because no matter how crazy one may be oneself, one can rest assured, Ol’ Mel-boogie definitely has one less oar in the water, and that makes falling asleep as easy Paris Hilton after two Cosmos.

Read Mean Betty on Mel Gibson

Incidentally, why is it that Mel is breathing so heavily on these tapes, Mean Betty is just wondering, mes cheries? Is he in a closet being naughty with a noose around his neck whilst yelling ferociously at Oksana Grigorieva? Seems likely.

In fact, Mean Betty almost can’t decide who is more disgusting: Mel Gibson or that new Carl’s Jr. footlong cheeseburger Mean Betty keeps reading about this week. Which is more deadly, do you suppose? Stay away from this burger at all costs, Mean Betty insists. However, pets, if a gun is ever put to your head (especially since we all know Mel carries one) and you are forced to choose between consuming one of these greasy, heart attack-inducing ground chuck foot-longs or spending a night on a remote island with Mel Gibson, Mean Betty suggests you start swallowing the beef immediately. 

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Mean Betty feels terrible for the people (see, Meanie has a heart… sometimes) on the set of his Jodie Foster-directed film The Beaver, which is still in post-production. Popeater reports the crazy, racist Mel was totally shocked after his rants were leaked but still showed up for work where “everyone was walking on eggshells around him. It was the weirdest set ever.” Mean Betty would have worn a HAZMAT suit to that set. One can never be too careful when it comes wild animals, non?

Is it just Mean Betty, or does Mel Gibson seem like the lovechild of John Edwards, Tiger Woods, Jesse James and Hitler?

And which would you rather meet over dinner? Mel or the footlong  cheeseburger? Do tell!


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0 thoughts on “Mean Betty: Mel Gibson vs. The Footlong Cheeseburger

  1. You can walk away from a foot-long cheeseburger, but you can’t escape CRAZY. It’s not a choice, it’s a state of being. Mel needs a professional psychiatric intervention…Umm, like YESTERDAY!!! Why are his adult children not stepping in and insisting that he get help?!?

  2. That SOB the interview with access hollywood just look at his crazy eyes and what’s up with the pulling on his arm hairs I WILL NEVER WATCH A MEL GIBSON FILM, TV SHOW EVER AGAIN. Screw you Mel Gibson!!

  3. I think that footlong cheeseburger might just be the answer. If inserted with enough force down ones throat, it could end the panting and spewing forth of profanity.
    I lived with a guy for 13 years that sounds exactly like Mel. Panting , snorting and spewing.

  4. I think we should hear less about Mel in either case. I don’t know why the character of the actor reflects on how much you enjoy the movie, but it does. Too bad, I really liked Maverick…

    Does the foot long cheeseburger come with a warning label?

  5. Why the one sided reporting Mean Betty? What about the fact that Oksana signed detailed joint custody agreements with Gibson after the alleged abuse without ever raising any issues? Why has Oksana repeatedly gone to the press with allegations before the police or the family courts? Why did she change her entire tune after finding a new lawyer that wanted to nullify the existing child support and visitation agreement. The recordings start mid-conversation so we don’t know what led up to the outburst – but while it is not excusable – if Oksana was trying to set him up-given what was at stake with his career (one only needs to look at the comments on this blog to see what was at stake), you can see why he flew off the handle. We don’t know what really went down – but I think the evidence is pointing to Oksana trying to get more money out of Mel and using their daughter as a pawn, and Mel overreacting more than just a tad. They both look pretty bad here. This is a nothing more than a very nasty custody battle. I remember when my parents were divorcing my dad flying off the handle and saying some equally nasty things – but my dad is still a good guy. I also know of women who have threatened their husbands with made up charges if the husbands don’t give them what they want in a divorce proceeding. Seriously – aren’t we all overreacting to the whole situation just a bit. Imagine being in a nasty divorce and having private arguments aired for your boss and losing your job over it. Not nice. There is no reason Oksana needed to make any of this public. It could have all been handled with the courts. Imagine how the child will feel when she gets older and all of this is public. Do you really think Oksana had anyone’s interests other than her own when she chose to go public?

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