Mean Betty on Miley Cyrus and Higher Education
She can’t be tamed by college? You’re kidding!
Happy Monday, darlings! How was your weekend? Marvelous, one hopes! Mean Betty was lounging by the pool Sunday afternoon, scrolling through all those delicious celebrity web sites, when a headline caught her eye: “Miley Rules Out College.”
Hmmm. Somehow, Mean Betty is not surprised. Are you, dearest poppets? After all, dressing in bondage gear, bellowing that you can’t be tamed and having an X-rated photo or two on the Internet are not exactly the steps one takes on the path to an institution of higher learning.
Like many overpaid brats child stars, Miley, 17, has been privately tutored throughout her stellar career. She’s now on the brink of getting her high school diploma, and after that, as that rather bizarre Alice Cooper once sang, “School’s out forever.”
Said the teen angel, “My sister went to college for two years and then decided she wants to be a musician and now she is a musician. I just already know what I want to do.”
And what exactly would that be, little Miss Miley? Do you plan to make black underwear the centerpiece of your wardrobe? Record more unintelligible “pop” songs that invariably require lots of dry ice on stage? Break away from your smarmy father at last? (Oops, that last goal is perhaps too sensible for Ms. Cyrus.)
Somehow, Mean Betty thinks that what Miley “wants to do” is just more of the same. And going to college is too much trouble to fit in, what with all those lovely premieres, stage shows, photo ops and fashion giveaways going on. Such a good example, kittens, for all those young girls who simply worship our little superstar!