3. Rupert Sanders
Ah, yes: This year’s greatest Hollywood cheating scandal! Kristen Stewart has largely been forgiven for her indiscretion with her Snow White and the Huntsman director, due in part to her age (she is still quite young and therefore still prone to making mistakes) and in part to the ways she has attempted to make amends with the vampire boy she betrayed. Mr. Sanders, however? There is no excuse. You are 41. You should know better. Even if you happen to be having marital problems, having an affair will not solve them. Shame on you, Rupert. Shame.
4. Gwyneth Paltrow
Oh, Gwynnie. Gwynnie, Gwynnie, Gwynnie. Meanie is perhaps stretching the Urban Dictionary definition of “turkey” in this instance—that is, “a person who is not in with the current culture”—to something more along the lines of, “a person who is not in touch with the current culture.” How else does one explain her $90 plain white t-shirt? Or her strange and unusual garment cataloging and storage system? It doesn’t get much more out of touch than that, kittens.
5. Lindsay Lohan
Oh, kittens. Meanie cannot TELL you how sad she is to have to include Lindsay on this list. After she hit rock bottom with her jail sentence last fall (so what if her stay lasted only four and a half hours?), she finally made good on her the terms of her probation, completed her community service hours, and even went back to work. Meanie SO hoped that she had well and truly turned her life around! But alas, it’s looking more and more like this is not the case, especially with the sudden loss of her long-suffering publicist last month. Lindsay, darling? Please find a way to keep yourself on track—and if you can’t do it yourself, then please find someone to help you! Meanie would HATE to have to include you on her Celebrity Turkeys list next year! Oh, and also, please refrain from making anymore silly comments like the one you dished out about Hurricane Sandy.
And that, kittens, concludes Meanie’s list of 2012 Celebrity Turkeys. May you have a very happy Thanksgiving full of family, friends, loved ones, and deliciousness—with no Celebrity Turkeys in sight!