In Her Words
Does the New Year Mean a New Me?
And would I be pretty annoying to everyone I meet?
-Candace Cavanaugh Buehner
For the last few years or so, the New Year has always seemed pretty much exactly like the Old Year to me – same house, same husband, same job, same children, same benign addictions to gossip magazines, summer sausage and wines under $10 (sometimes, all at once!). But in 2009, it will be different. I am starting this year determined to become the New Me.
Who is this lovely creature? In a nutshell:
1. The New Me will tell the store clerk when the New Me has been undercharged for things. Or given too much change. Every single time; not just once, when the New Me is feeling guilty.
2. The New Me will not criticize people for their questionable fashion choices, since the New Me knows that the boots the New Me often wears are pleather. From Target. In two colors.
3. The New Me will not rename dishes in order to make them more appealing to small children, since the New Me knows that said children are hip to the fact that Astronaut Tomato Blast-Off! is really Trader Joe’s Eggplant Parmigiana.
4. The New Me also will not yell at her adorable small children – nor will she judge the children of others – but instead, the New Me will relish each and every one of their little steps taken toward independence, realizing that these spectacular, audience-drawing temper tantrums are really cute.
5. The New Me will not nag her husband but will have a heart-to-heart talk with him about feelings, and expectations and 50/50 child-rearing responsibilities, after which they will hug and snuggle. He may make the New Me a cup of tasty cocoa (with Baileys!) after our “sharing” time.
Realistically, of course, I have no illusions that the New Year means a New Me. But I always have hope that I can do at least one thing in the New Year in a different, and better, way.
For 2009, that means any clerk who may have given me an inadvertent bargain in the past will now have the peace of mind – and balanced cash register – to know that I am now doing the right thing.
I also know that LEATHER boots are on sale this weekend at Macy’s!
Candace Cavanaugh Buehner lives and works outside of Detroit, MI, where she is still feeling (very) haunted by the $10 undercharging she received at Crate and Barrel three years ago. The New Me would not have then used that money for a latte.