Alternate between idolizing your ex and then despising him with the intensity of a thousand suns. Remember only the great things about him, bore your friends with stories about that one time when you went to that one place and he was so sweet! Immediately follow this up with a rant all about how much you hate that jerk and are SO happy to be rid of him. Cry. Then laugh. Cry some more.
Wake up one day not feeling like you’re choking on your own tears. Miracle! Resist the urge to check his Twitter feed and when your BFF texts and invites you to brunch, you aren’t disappointed when it’s not HIM. Feel extremely tired…tired of wasting your energy on someone else. Start feeling like a weight is slowly being lifted, and take a deep breath. You smile more than you cry these days. Look, you’re laughing at Modern Family…you’re finding yourself again.
6. On the prowl
Get it, girl. You are so over him! That is so DONE! At least that is what you insist on telling everyone you see. Mothers, lock up your sons. It’s go time. Flirt, dance, make-out, date, online date, look at every man and search desperately for something in them that will make you forget your ex. Ignore the sinking feeling you get sometimes and the voice in your head comparing the man you once loved with all these random dudes…remember how he kissed, how you felt in his arms, the things he said to you and become paralyzed with the irrational fear that you might never feel that way again.
You’re single, and sometimes it sucks. Stand in the present moment and accept where you are, and what got you here. Your relationship is over, and that realization no longer makes you want to burst into tears. Hold on to the positive. The things you learned. The special memories. Accept that you might always look back on the relationship and wonder what if… we all do. Accept that nobody you meet in the future will be exactly like your ex…accept that they might be better. Accept that you can’t take your ex with you into your future, so turn around and face forward. Accept that getting over someone doesn’t mean you have to forget about them, but it does mean that you need to let them go.