The Baby Name of the Year Is…The Situation
It’s true! The Situation is THE 2010 baby name.
Moms-to-be, please don’t jump on this bandwagon. We’re begging you.
In a contest for the baby name of the year 2010, the readers of the website www.babynamewizard.com have chosen the nickname of Jersey Shore’s boorish, overly muscled, oiled-up Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino. The website’s founder, Laura Wattenberg, sounded a cautionary note about the winner of her readers’ contest: She said it didn’t represent an endorsement by babynamewizard. Nor was it “a claim that the name will soon be heard in nurseries across the land. It’s a recognition that this name captures our moment in time, both reflecting and shaping the world around us.”
Wow. That is really sad.
Still, we kind of enjoy imagining how such a child would be addressed through the years:
*“Don’t pull the cat’s tail, The Situation!”
* “Stop copying her math answers, The Situation!”
* “Haven’t you ever heard of condoms, The Situation?”
One thing we’re pretty sure we would never hear:
*Congratulations on winning the Nobel Peace Prize, The Situation!”
Wattenberg says that choosing this “name” is part of a trend: The desperate search of parents to find a name for their child that’s really different. Some parents, she says, are just using words from reference books: Legend, Malaysia. Others seek uniqueness in the spelling of a name (Juelz, Maxx).
We shouldn’t make too much fun, though. According to babynamewizard, The Situation isn’t all that dumb. He’s trying to trademark his name for his officially licensed products. What would those be? A laundry bag? The stiffest hair gel you’ve ever encountered? Tanning oil that will never wash off?
Our only hope is that if he gets his trademark, he’ll be able to charge a fee for every child who bears his name. That might persuade some parents to back off, if nothing else does.
Meanwhile, if you’re naming your child John or Mary, congratulations! You’re a true pioneer. (babynamewizard)
Jane Farrell is a senior editor at BettyConfidential.