The Future CEO: Jack Donaghy vs. Jim Halpert
Is it even fair to pit the co-manager of the Scranton branch of a paper distribution company against a top-level executive who almost became the CEO of General Electric? From the way that Jim has risen through the ranks and handled corporate figureheads like David Wallace, it’s clear that he’s not yet finished climbing the corporate ladder. But even if you fast-forwarded Jim’s clock to make him Jack’s age, there would be no competition: When it comes to juggling multinational companies with a sizzling love life, Jack is the clear-cut winner.
WINNER: Official or not, Jack the “master baiter” will always be the C.E.O.
The Ambiguously Gay Duo: J.D. Lutz vs. Oscar Martinez
Though he tiptoes around the closet door, it’s not the vague sexuality that inspires his colleagues to yell “Shut up, Lutz!” even when he’s not in the room. Awkward revelations about undescended testicles are what really invite the mockery – when Lutz had a heart attack, no one even blinked. Despite being outed by Michael, Oscar handled the situation gracefully and still remains a much-needed voice of reason.
WINNER: For his ability to draw the line between personal and professional, but still think on his feet when the two worlds merge, Oscar is our winner.
The Smarty Pants: Toofer vs. Andy Bernard
The Ivy Leagues go head-to-head in this cardigan-heavy match-up: Toofer hails from Harvard while Andy is a proud Cornell alum, and both name-drop their school every chance they get. But while Toofer is usually in on the jokes (Verdukianism!), poor Andy is often the butt of them. And, seriously, how do you lose a girl to Dwight?
WINNER: Cambridge. (“Duh,” say Harvard grads everywhere.)