The Online Dating Newbie: It Doesn't Happen Overnight

One Betty continues her online dating experiment, and gets some helpful advice from an expert.
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But Cut Your Ties
These sites sounded exciting and I was definitely interested in trying them out, but I was hesitant because I would then have profiles on five sites. A little excessive, I joked it was only a matter of time before someone I knew would find out I was on every dating site in existence. I already have a strong online presence because of my past in editorial – I don’t want to add my romantic life to my growing Google search results.

Laurie offered two simple solutions for this one: I shouldn’t have my first name in any of my dating site usernames and I should create a completely new and separate email account just for my Internet love life. That way, my name wouldn’t be traceable to any of these sites, and no one on the dating sites could find out more about me than my profile allows. It’s a win-win, and I don’t know why I didn’t think of doing these two things before.

Mesh Virtuality with Reality
One of the points I keep stressing during this online dating experiment is how dating in the virtual world is so completely different than in reality. I still have the strong desire to meet someone naturally, in the flesh when I’m out living my life. Is there anything so wrong with that? To have our instant attraction when we spot one another across the bar blossom into an awesome and happy relationship?

No, there isn’t, Laurie said. In fact, there are ways to use the Internet to not only make those in-person encounters happen more often, but to make them be more profound as well. My reaction to this news was, “WHAT?! Tell me what they are now!”

Clearly, that was my vodka tonic talking, but I actually was pretty excited to hear about how you can mesh virtuality and reality into one giant cupid’s arrow. The first way is to use cheek’d, an ingenious site that gives you business cards with sexy sayings like “Act natural. We can get awkward later,” that you can give to someone you meet in person who you think is cute. The card offers a code that the person can enter at to access your online profile and learn more about you. Needless to say, I’m obsessed with this one and have already requested my Cheek’d cards.

Read Online Dating Newbie: This Is Why I Was Hesitant to Online Date

The second way is to use the new dating apps that have been popping up for smartphones. Urban Signals is a GPS-enabled app for the iPhone that will let you view the profiles of people in your direct vicinity, and “signal” them to see if they’d like to meet up. For Droid users, there’s Meet Moi, which works in a similar way.

I wish I had these awesome tools the other day when I locked eyes with a hottie on 52nd street who looked like Brandon Routh from Superman Returns…only hotter. I hate missed connections!

Thanks to all of Laurie’s great advice, though, it sounds like I won’t be having those anymore. I’m really looking forward to the next chapter of my online dating experiment – by using these tips, it sounds like the game will get a lot more interesting, and I’m sure I’ll have some great potential dates lined up in no time. And of course, I’ll have all the details for you right here!

Faye Brennan is assistant editor at BettyConfidential.

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0 thoughts on “The Online Dating Newbie: It Doesn't Happen Overnight

  1. I used Laurie for online dating help when I had no idea what to do, and now I’m in a long-term, happy relationship! She’s the best! And I found him on, Yay heels. You just never know!

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