What to Do If Your Friend Is in Love With a Jerk

You love your friend, you just can't stand her boyfriend. Yes, there are ways to handle the sitch.
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two women talking about a guy

The thing is though, there is a huge gray area to navigate. Many guys fall into the half annoying, semi-disrespectful category. Or maybe you can’t quite put your finger on why exactly your friend’s boyfriend gives you the heebie jeebies, but your intuition is saying that something isn’t quite right. At this point, it’s time to remember the most important person in the equation…your friend.

Consider one thing…if your friend is dating a jerk, it’s only a matter of time before she’ll need you. Really need you. This isn’t the time to make her life harder by insulting her boyfriend at every opportunity or trying to convince her to dump the loser once and for all. Don’t give her an ultimatum (Lauren, I’m looking at you). If you can’t stomach the idea of spending time with her when she’s with her man, don’t. Invite her to a girls only brunch or have a weekly BFF mani pedi date.

Read It’s The Clean Freak vs. The Slob: Who Wins in the Relationship?

If you absolutely must say something to her about the guy she’s dating, be kind, gentle and specific. “I think you can do better because he cheats on you” will take you further than “I just hate him!” As much as we wish that we could protect our loved ones from heartache or as much as you know you’ll be picking up the pieces when he breaks her heart in a month, she is the one who ultimately has to decide if the relationship is right for her. As a friend, it’s your job to be there for her. It’s your job to be happy for her if she’s over the moon in love, and it’s also your job to resist the urge to scream I TOLD YOU SO when she calls you at 3 am in tears. Pat yourself on the back silently and then get your cute booty to the store…your girl needs ice cream and a good friend desperately.

Liz is the social media manager for We Love Dates, a worldwide online dating site. Join for free using code WLD GUEST. For more dating advice and tips, visit their popular We Love Dates blog.


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