ASK REAL GUYS
He Still Provides for Her
Dear ASK REAL GUYS: My boyfriend allows his ex-wife and her two kids to live in his second home for free, and he also pays for all the utilities. They got divorced 10 years ago, but he claims to do it for the kids. I don’t like the idea of him taking care of another woman. She also has boyfriends who “take care” of her, which is quite disturbing to me as I keep seeing the bills come in. He has said that he is either going to get her to move, purchase the house or pay rent. We have been together for two years, and have had many a discussion concerning this topic. Unfortunately nothing has changed, and she is still living there for free. If we stay together or end up getting married, would I be wrong to expect him to change the arrangement? My friends agree that this situation is completely inappropriate. What do you think?
Avery: Although it’s very honorable that your boyfriend has taken such measures to ensure that his CHILDREN are comfortable in a nice home with no financial worries, it is very strange that your boyfriend continues to provide those same luxuries for his ex-wife. You may want to ask your boyfriend if there’s a deal or divorce agreement in place that requires him to make these provisions for her. If not, then you need to figure out if this arrangement is acceptable to you. If you have a good relationship with your boyfriend, and this just bugs you, you should think about letting it go and just focusing on your relationship with your man and his kids. Paying for a roof over his ex-wife’s head while she houses their children is no big deal if you can get over it. If he was paying her large sums of money on his own accord (no court order) and she’s just living off of him, you may have some real concerns to address with him.