Jeans Like Relationships
Neither are one-size-fits-all
By: Stephanie Smith
“You see how picky I am with my shoes, and they only go on my feet,” is Cher’s famous quote from the best movie ever made; Clueless. As she so eloquently relays, relationships can be compared to our wardrobes. Both evoke the passion inside of us, require our attention and focus and can be an outward manifestation of who we are and what we stand for.
One of my best friends approached me this week wanting a shoulder to cry on. The anguish, of course, was brought on by his girlfriend, and the story was the same as it has been for the past seven years. He just can’t seem to make their relationship work. “Women are like jeans,” I told him. “You may have to try on a lot of them before you find the one that makes your ass look amazing. Sure, you could buy True Religions or Sevens just because everyone else does, or because they are in style, but they may not be the best jeans for your body. Wait. Be patient. You will find that perfect pair of jeans.”
Ironically, before purchasing his current pair of jeans (her name is Wendy) he tried on quite a few pairs. He was unaware of his pattern, but all the jeans he tried on were, without exception, the same cut. Even when shopping at a different store, my friend would be drawn toward the low-rise skinny jeans; but as much as he wanted them to, they never fit him. He went from store to store, never trying boot-cut jeans, a pair of high-rise or one with a flared leg. He tried on Katherine and Jennifer, but they were the same style and didn’t feel right. Eventually, tired of searching for the perfect match, he ended up buying Erin and Lisa (at different times, of course) and both were pairs that still didn’t fit. They didn’t fit him at the store, in the car or when he took them home; and they still don’t fit him. He seems, however, determined to squeeze into those low-rise skinny jeans.
The way I see it, if we really want to make a pair of jeans fit us, we have options. Alterations and exercising are the two greatest inventions ever. Alterations mean you can try on a pair of jeans, and if they need to be taken in a little here, or let out a little there, the seamstress can do it. Exercising takes a little more time and work, but the long-term benefits can be tremendous. You can get rid of your muffin-top and tone your tush, strutting around feeling great in your new William Rasts. “You can fix your relationship in the same way you fix your jeans,” I told him. “I see three options: One: Buy new jeans; Two: Alter the jeans; or Three: Alter your own body. If your current relationship makes you live everyday feeling like you have a muffin-top, then change something! “
We spend hours, days, years trying to figure out which clothes, make up, shoes and jeans look best on us. We order online, shop at the mall and raid our friends’ closets. I say we should do the same thing with our romantic wardrobe. If you are still looking for the right fit, don’t be afraid to try some on, and try different styles; you might be surprised what looks best on you. And, if you want different results when you look in the mirror, you’ll need to try on a few different styles. Be picky about it! On the other hand, if you have already found the love of your life, make sure you keep that perfect fit. Spend time doing the work that will keep those jeans fitting perfectly. Work on yourself, don’t blame others. You go to the “gym.” Do sit ups and lunges; whatever it takes to keep your perfect fit looking as great as ever. Always remember, when you are feeling confused or bloated, take the pearls of wisdom that Cher Horowitz shared with us, change them around and tell yourself, “Be just as picky with your relationships as you are with your clothes!”
Tell us: Have you “tried on” a relationship that just didn’t fit?