Liquid Virgin

  Love+Sex Liquid Virgin A new gel promises a tiny vaginy -Carrie Seim Wondering what to get all those knocked up high school girls in Gloucester, Mass., for Christmas? We found the perfect stocking stuffer: Liquid Virgin Gel This “tightening lubricant” promises to restore your vagina to pristine condition with just a few squirts. As […]

 

Love+Sex

Liquid Virgin

A new gel promises a tiny vaginy

-Carrie Seim

Wondering what to get all those knocked up high school girls in Gloucester, Mass., for Christmas?

We found the perfect stocking stuffer:

Liquid Virgin Gel

This “tightening lubricant” promises to restore your vagina to pristine condition with just a few squirts.

As Feministing.com proclaims, “Now hating your genitals is easy, affordable and comes in packaging that looks like a cross between My Little Pony and White-Out!”

In a thoughtful nod to recapturing innocent girlhood, the “non-sticky” gel is strawberry scented.

Wow – my vagina feels tighter than ever! And smells sweet, too!

We’d be deeply shocked and offended if we weren’t ROFL over ridiculousness of the lame liquid gel promises. Still, it’s a pretty sad state of affairs when this is a real product and not some spectacular YouTube spoof.

On the bright side, we finally know what to buy for our hymenly-challenged love ones this holiday season.

Labia haters rejoice!


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