In her Words
Putting my Marriage First
What to do to maintain (and put the spark in!) your marriage or relationships as you juggle work and taking care of kids and other responsibilities
I have been happily married for almost 10 years and keeping the spark in my marriage has not always been easy. But if you give your marriage and your spouse the attention they deserve you will not only keep the flame alive, but also make it burn brighter. It is important to say hello and good-bye. I know the mornings are harried and the evenings more so, but make time to kiss good-bye and hello. It is not going to kill you to stop what you are doing and smooch. Be careful you are not sidetracked. See where I am going with this?
Make time for the two of you. No excuses! On the weekends, send the kids to bed early and do not watch TV, do not put on a movie. Instead, play a board game or cards…do something that will get you talking and engaged with one another. Do not be too competitive or you can end up not speaking at all. Board games too tame for you? Take a bath together. Put on some good music. Let him pick. Even if it is not mood music, he will be happy and that will make it easier for him to get into a tub of bubbles. Once you are both in the tub, you will have a chance to reconnect, literally.
Reconnecting after a long hectic week is what the two of you as a couple need.
Do not spend every weekend with friends or doing things that are taxing on your nerves, which end up being taxing on your relationship. Instead, slow down and take time for the two of you like you did when you were dating. Be kind to one another. Offer to make the other tea or something calming. Offer the other a back rub. Above all, slow down and remember that your relationship is the foundation of your family and if the foundation is in disrepair the family could fall apart as a result.
I am a firm believer in putting my marriage first. In doing so, I am building a strong foundation for my family. My husband and I are happy and loving with one another, we project that onto our son, and he in turn is happy and loving in the world.