In Her Words
Putting Quality Back in our Time
Committing to being together when we are
By: Jennifer Canzoneri
My husband, Mike, and I both work full-time, and we both – to some degree – commute. Also, our hours are just a hair conflicting, with me leaving the house before the sun is fully up (especially with that pesky daylight saving time in effect) and Mike not getting out of bed until well past 10 a.m. When we get home at night, we do what I would imagine many couples do: We plop down, exhausted, and try and steal a few minutes together before one of us (usually me) passes out in front of a Friends rerun.
When the weekend (finally) rolls around, we find our schedules packed tightly with activities: weddings, baby showers, work happy hours, time with family and friends. And, as usual, Monday shows up with little warning, and it leaves us scratching our heads over where, exactly, our weekend disappeared to. I find myself – more often than not – wondering about the last time my husband and I had relaxed, enjoyable, quality time together.
We were out of town this past weekend, at a wedding for a family friend. Sure, we spent 10 total hours in the car together, but we were both stealing naps and perusing magazines. We came back Sunday evening to a mountain of tasks we had to tackle and a four-legged “daughter” to pick up and show attention to. On my drive to work on Monday morning, I felt a sadness wash over me: I missed my husband, even though I had technically just spent an entire 48 hours with him.
I think we need to make some changes to our daily routines and really focus on lightening up our weekend schedules. What’s more, we need to commit to being fully together, emotionally, whenever we’re together physically. This means closing Google Reader more often, watching interesting television shows with him, sitting next to him and just being with him. It means not letting Monday show up with little to show for the weekend.