ASK REAL GUYS
Dear ASK REAL GUYS: My ex-husband (who cheated on me, which was the reason for our divorce) insists on contacting me. I’ve fallen for his lines of how “he’s changed” and “he’s become so nice and kind” and blah blah blah. My questions: Why does he constantly contact me (swearing he is not with anyone else), when it seems to me his only goal is to torment and be mean to me? Why do men do this? Why can’t they just let us be happy and move on with our lives?
Steven: The only reasons that he is able to torment you are that you allow him to and you pick up the phone. Contact is two-sided, and if you are not interested in any continuing relationship with him, ignore the calls and they will most likely go away. If you secretly like this drama, quit complaining and take responsibility for your actions. Be careful that you are not addicted to the drama and that you don’t secretly feel that you don’t deserve to be with someone who will treat you well. So, in effect, you are putting up with this. This situation is more of a reflection and a result of who you are rather than who he is. Love yourself if you want others to love you.